Funny quotes calm

13 Funny calm quotes

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Funny Quotes Mar 31, 2025

Fellas, if your lady is mad, ask her if it’s because she’s put on some weight. That’ll calm her down.

Funny Quotes Mar 19, 2025

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Funny Quotes Mar 8, 2025

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly. Because communication is key.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

It’s funny how you can annoy unhappy people by remaining calm.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

My boss said he likes how I remain so calm under pressure. Can’t tell him it’s because I don’t give a shit.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

My superpower? Staying calm when talking to idiots.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Calm down, engine light, if I can run on broken parts, so can you.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025