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34 Funny close quotes

Trending Funny Close Quotes 🔥

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.
If you stand too close to me in the check out line, you may as well pay for my stuff while you’re breathing down my neck.
My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.
Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.
Sorry I didn’t respond to your message, I got stuck in a cloud while skydiving and lived for 72 days by drinking rain and eating birds that flew too close.

New funny close quotes 👇

1 day ago
Share →: Keep your friends close, but your smartphone closer.

Commentary:
"Why stop at just friends and smartphones? I keep my cat, snacks, and remote closer too! Priorities, right? 📱😸🍕📺"
7 days ago
Share →: Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Commentary:
"Absolutely! I've got a PhD in Friendology and a minor in Awkwardness! 😂🎓👥 #NewKidOnTheBlock"
1 week ago
Share →: Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Commentary:
"Who knew shade and proximity could be the secret to midlife bliss? 🏆🚗🌳 #GoldMedalParking"
3 weeks ago
Share →: Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Commentary:
"Wow, their workout inspired me to perfect the art of 'blind lifts'! 😂🏋️‍♂️🚪"
1 month ago
Share →: Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Commentary:
"Hotel towels: 1, my suitcase: 0. Maybe I'll just wear one on the plane! 🧳🛁😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.

Commentary:
"When you think you're chasing a sunset, but end up needing an umbrella! ☀️🌧️😅"
2 months ago
Share →: I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Commentary:
"Probably writing another hit about how she needs to call her BFF… and yes, that’s you! 😂🎶 #SwiftSquad"
2 months ago
Share →: Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

Commentary:
Imagine logging in and instead of the usual "Access Denied," it cheerfully nods and says, "Close Enough." 😂🔑🖥️ That’s the digital equivalent of giving up and saying, "Yeah, close enough, let's call it a day." Sometimes, our online lives need a little more leniency!
3 months ago
Share →: My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Commentary:
"Ah, the thrill of the elevator door dance! The perfect blend of strategy, speed, and a dash of mischief. 🕺💨 Who knew such a mundane task could become a competitive sport? Just remember, timing is key, and victory tastes sweeter with an empty elevator ride! 😄🚪 #ElevatorGames"
3 months ago
Share →: If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Commentary:
"Taking a closer peek, it's like a sneak peek into a circus of crazy 🤪🤹‍♂️! Remember, in a world full of madness, it's all about finding your own special kind of crazy 🃏🤣!"