103 Funny dark quotes

• I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

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  2 weeks ago

  box, dark, dark humor, heart, hoodie, humor, i, love, me, sarcasm, want

• I thought I liked seeing movies, but it turns out I like eating candy in a dark room where it’s illegal to talk to me.

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  3 weeks ago

  candy, dark, dark room, eating, humor, i, illegal, irony, liked, me, movie, movie theater, room, seeing, silence, snack, talk, theater, thought, where

• All I think about is death and sex.

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  3 weeks ago

  dark, dark humor, death, humor, i, mind, obsession, sex, think, thought

• If you send a man to war today, he’s gonna go there and take dark exposure aesthetic pics.

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  4 weeks ago

  aesthetic, dark, dark exposure, exposure, humor, man, photo, pics, send, take, today, war

• It’s the perfect time of year to focus on my indoor hobbies, like lying down in a dark room and feeling insane.

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  1 month ago

  dark, dark room, feeling, feeling insane, focus, health, hobby, humor, indoor, indoor hobby, insane, lying, lying down, mental, mental health, perfect, perfect time, relaxation, room, self-care, time, year

• You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

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  1 month ago

  alone, ancestor, ancestors, dance, dark, darkness, depressed, depression, eat, eating, eating alone, fight, glowing, glowing rectangle, loneliness, meal, meals, rectangle, staring, technology, together, while

• I consider the second page of Google results the dark web.

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  1 month ago

  consider, dark, dark web, engine, Google, Google result, humor, i, internet, internet humor, joke, online, online joke, page, result, results, search, search engine, second, web, web page

• Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

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  1 month ago

  chocolate, dark, dark chocolate, diet, diet joke, eating, food, food humor, healthy, healthy eating, humor, joke, vegetable, vegetables

• And for my next trick, I’ll set your soul on fire.

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  2 months ago

  dark, dark humor, fire, humor, illusion, magic, next, performance, set, soul, trick

• What doesn’t kill you gives you a twisted, dark sense of humor.

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  2 months ago

  adversity, dark, dark humor, humor, kill, resilience, sense, survival, twisted, wit

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