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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Before I work on myself, does anyone like me unhinged?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Money is always a motive for murder. Stay broke.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I always say “it’s so expensive” and then buy it nonetheless.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

771 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,933

Funny Quotes Topics

13,906

Funny Quotes Images

10,933

Updated

12 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

You befriend a guy and a few days later he’s like “I wanna talk to you about something”. Please, God, let it be about the economy.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

My immune system told me it’s a lover not a fighter.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

With certain people, you get nauseous just hearing their name.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Learn from the mistakes of others, you can never live long enough to make them all yourself.

Spotted on YouTube:

Hold on, let me overthink this.

Reported on WhatsApp:

Having a teenager is fun because the voice in my head that questions everything I do now has a friend.

Breaking via Discord:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Shared recently on Slack:

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

Reported on WeChat:

I wish I had a friend like me.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

771 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,933

Funny Quotes Topics

13,906

Funny Quotes Images

10,933

Updated

12 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

The lion doesn’t concern himself with much of anything these days.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

My grandad fought Germans on the beaches of Normandy. This was last summer and it was very embarrassing.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Just landed via WeChat:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Live now on Discord:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

Making waves on Twitch:

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Making waves on Threads:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Seen just now on Discord:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Just landed via YouTube:

Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

Reported on X:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Boy, are you a piñata? Because I have an overwhelming urge to beat you with a stick.

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