Commentary:
If people could hear my thoughts, I'd need a full-time PR manager 😂🤫 #MindChaos
14856 Funny humor quotes
My parents grew to like my girlfriend so much, they take her as their own daughter. Now they started looking for a proper boyfriend for her.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've been promoted to the honorary position of the "starter boyfriend." 😂👫👉⬆️
You’re 25, stressing like you’re 40, because you want to be rich before 30, am I right?
Commentary:
Sounds like we need a nap and a lottery ticket! 😂🛌💸
I’m done wasting money this summer, unless you guys want to do something this weekend.
Commentary:
"Totally saving money… unless we're spending it on epic weekend adventures! 🌞💸😂"
It’s scary when an attractive person is attracted to you, omg.
Commentary:
When you're so shocked that someone hot likes you, you start questioning if you accidentally became a celebrity overnight! 🌟😱🔥
All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.
Commentary:
When your hand can't decide between a dumbbell and a bag of chips 😅💪😋
When you split a dessert, the waiter should bring two forks and one of those chess clocks you smack to let the other person know it’s their turn.
Commentary:
Counting calories and seconds! 🍰⏱️ Is it my turn yet? 🤔
The best part about having a crush is when they crush all your hopes and dreams.
Commentary:
When reality hits harder than my first crush at a demolition derby 😂💔 #DreamSquashed
We used to pass notes in class like spies. Folded like origami. Deep like Shakespeare.
Commentary:
This brings back memories of mastering the fine art of clandestine paper-folding 😎🕵️♀️📄✍️
Wow, you did such a great job clicking in your little spreadsheets today. Super proud of you.
Commentary:
Impressive work flexing those spreadsheet muscles today! 🏋️♂️📊💪 Keep clicking your way to glory!