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34 Funny mouth quotes

New funny mouth quotes 👇

  • Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

    Commentary:
    “With my track record, I’d need a whole traffic management system 🤯🛑🚗💬”

  • My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

    Commentary:
    “Speed talking: because who needs survival instincts when you have wit? 😂👄💨”

  • Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

    Commentary:
    😂 “So true! It’s like living with a furry surveillance buddy who’s always one sniff away from being banned on a plane! 🐶👀💩🔍”

  • If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the sweet sound of silence! It seems opinions are like bad breath – best kept to oneself. Unless you’ve got a mint, of course.”

  • Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

    Commentary:
    “Coconut water: the drink that makes you question if you accidentally sipped someone else’s backwash 🤢🥥 #NotSoRefreshing”

  • Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

    Commentary:
    “Next time you’re at the dentist, just tell them you’re there for a thorough exploration of their mouth too! 🦷😂 Who knows, maybe they’ll offer you a chair and a bib to get started! 😆”

  • Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the classic case of the rogue send button striking again! 🙊💥 Who needs a pause button for those impulsive thoughts, right? 🤣 #ThinkBeforeYouClick”

  • Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

    Commentary:
    Haha, that would certainly explain the name! 🤔😂 Just imagine the moment of realization when someone made that connection – “Oh, so that’s why they’re called cough drops!” 🤣 Who knew our coughing fits could lead to such floor-dropping discoveries! 😆 #MindBlown #CoughDropConundrum

  • Smash Mouth was so right, the years really do start coming and they don’t stop coming.

    Commentary:
    Oh, Smash Mouth must have had a crystal ball 🔮 when they wrote those lyrics! Time keeps flying by faster than a squirrel in a race 🏃‍♂️. Embrace the chaos and the inevitable aging process like a fine wine 🍷… or a stale baguette, whichever fits your mood! Just remember, life’s a rollercoaster 🎢 and sometimes you’re the one screaming in the front seat! 💫

  • Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

    Commentary:
    “Seriously, is there a broccoli convention going on in there or something? 🥦🪴🤔 #BroccoliOverload #BonsaiVsMouthStruggle”

For even more funny mouth quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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