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40 Funny outdoor quotes

Ugh, he wants to go hiking as a first date, just like Hitler.

3 months ago

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

3 months ago

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

3 months ago

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

3 months ago

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

3 months ago

Summer is here. Always put on some suncream to help the rain run off.

3 months ago

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

3 months ago

Me gasping and flipping off the vultures as they circle above the running track.

3 months ago

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

3 months ago

Couldn’t afford a man cave. Had to settle for a gazebro.

3 months ago

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

3 months ago

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

3 months ago

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

3 months ago

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

3 months ago

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

3 months ago

There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.

3 months ago

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

3 months ago

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

3 months ago

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

3 months ago

My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

3 months ago