Funny pill quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

  Commentary:
  "Gun violence? Nah, I'm more of a 'reload my pill caddy and remote batteries' kind of person. Stay loaded, but in a different way! 💊🔋😅"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

  Commentary:
  "Seems like balcony plants demand as much attention as a high-maintenance partner! 🌿💊 Maybe gardening gloves should come with a warning label next time 😉"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'cookie chaser' diet technique – because nothing says 'healthy lifestyle' like using dessert to swallow your diet pill 🍪💊 Hopefully the cookies don't cancel out the pill! 😅"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Actually, men should take the pill. It makes more sense to unload the gun than to shoot at a bulletproof vest.

  Commentary:
  "Men taking the pill? Now that's what you call a true 'bulletproof' plan! 🚫💊😂 Who knew unloading the gun could be the ultimate form of contraception! 🔫😏 #SafeAndSound"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I tiptoe near my medicine cabinet because I don’t want to wake my sleeping pills.

  Commentary:
  "Approaching the medicine cabinet like a burglar sneaking past a guard dog, for who wants to disturb the slumber of those precious sleeping pills? 😴🚪💊 #SilentNight"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

  Commentary:
  "Whoever said medication couldn't be fun clearly hasn't seen me in action – humming, dancing, and organizing pills like a pro! 💊💃 Embrace the nutty side, it's the happiest one! 😜 #PillPoppingDiva"

For even more funny pill quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny pill quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌