76 Funny safety quotes

• All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

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  2 months ago

  A.I., AI, artificial, artificial intelligence, artificial stupidity, being, humor, intelligence, me, office, people, replacement, safe, safety, smart, smart people, stupidity, technology, workplace

• I have poor night vision so I upgraded to LED headlights because it’s important to me to ensure nobody else can see either.

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  2 months ago

  driving, else, headlights, humor, i, important, irony, led, LED headlights, me, night, night vision, nobody, poor, safety, visibility, vision

• Writers should get a direct line to the FBI so we can call them and give them a heads up when we’re googling ways to poison someone but just for a story.

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  2 months ago

  call, creativity, crime, direct, FBI, give, Googling, heads, humor, joke, just, line, poison, research, safety, should, someone, story, writers

• The most important thing to remember when driving is that not everyone is smart.

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  2 months ago

  awareness, driving, everyone, humor, important, important thing, remember, reminder, road, safety, smart, thing

• Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

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  2 months ago

  across, ask, driving, Google, Google Maps, humor, left, left turn, maps, navigation, needs, oncoming, oncoming traffic, safety, setting, take, traffic, turn, where

• One thing that could really “level-up” the experience of being a pedestrian would be if cars had some kind of feature that could indicate whether or not they were going to turn in a particular direction.

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  2 months ago

  being, cars, direction, driving, experience, feature, going, humor, level-up, pedestrian, road, road safety, safety, signal, thing, turn, turn signal

• You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

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  2 months ago

  advice, always, dangerous, dangerous thing, doing, helmet, humor, politics, safety, should, talking, thing, things, wear

• I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

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  2 months ago

  blue, fashion, flashing, foot, footwear, funny idea, humor, i, idea, police, safety, should, sneakers, think, wear

• Skinny people are easier to get blown around by storms. These donuts are for my safety.

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  2 months ago

  around, donuts, food, humor, people, safety, self-care, skinny, storms, weight

• That beeping of the parking assistant when you get too close to other cars. I’d like that for people.

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  2 months ago

  assistant, beeping, cars, close, funny observation, humor, ID, interaction, observation, parking, parking assistant, people, safety, social, social interaction, too

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