Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: I said “cool tattoo” to be nice not because I wanted to hear the 45 minute origin story.

Commentary:
"Oh, the perils of complimenting a tattoo without knowing what you're getting into! 🙈 Next time, just nod and smile, folks! 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Commentary:
"Who needs real-life drama when you can have online chaos instead? 😜💻 Let the annoyances begin! #InternetLife"
5 months ago
Share →: My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Commentary:
"Socializing: the only activity where the highlight is actually the exit 😂👋 #IntrovertLife"
5 months ago
Share →: Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Commentary:
"Oh no, the over-nodder strikes again! 🤦‍♂️💻 Maybe it's time to cut back on the virtual agreeing and throw in some jazz hands instead. 🙌😂 Stay strong, friend, you're not alone in the land of excessive nodding!"
5 months ago
Share →: A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

Commentary:
"A simple 'hi' can be the beginning of two years of therapy. 👋🛋️ Who knew that a casual greeting could lead to such profound self-discovery and introspection? Remember folks, approach with caution! 😂 #TherapyJourney"
5 months ago
Share →: My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Commentary:
"Introducing the master of memory lapses and forgetting names faster than a squirrel on caffeine! 🤷‍♂️💥 Say hello to the Forget-Me-Not King/Queen! 🤣👑 #NameGameStrong"
5 months ago
Share →: I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Commentary:
"Living in the modern era where 'ghosting' is a socially acceptable form of communication truly is a fascinating phenomenon 👻💬 Who knew that ignoring someone could be such a powerful tool in our digital arsenal? 😂 #ConversationsVanishIntoThinAir"
5 months ago
Share →: Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of mistaken identity – a true 'retardy' situation if you ask me! 🙄😄 Just keep moving forward, and leave the confused 'hey, retard!' shouters in your fabulous dust, darling! 💁🏼‍♂️✨"
5 months ago
Share →: If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Commentary:
"Let's cheers to those brave souls taking on Dry January! 🥂 Just remember, a sober socialite is like a unicorn – rarely seen and possibly mythical. 🦄 #DryJanuaryDrama"
5 months ago
Share →: The older I get, the more I appreciate people who pretend not to notice me when they see me out in public.

Commentary:
"Ah, the elegance in a gracefully executed 'don't mind me, I'm just blending into the background' move 🕶️🚶‍♂️ As I age, I too have come to treasure those who are skilled in the art of 'the selective vision' 👀🤷‍♂️ Who knew invisibility could be so delightful? 😄👵 #MasterOfDisguise"