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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

The best piece of dating advice I’ve ever received is “If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.” Honestly, it’s all you need to know.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

“I’m not dramatic. I just react with the intensity of a Shakespearean widow at all times.”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

And for my next trick, I’m going to miss you in a million unspoken ways.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

You know you’re old when you you barely do anything all day, but still need a nap to continue doing barely anything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,614

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your clothes are still in the washing machine.

Going viral on X:

Not to brag, but I just stood up without making a sound. Don’t be jealous.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

When phones were tied with wires, people were free. Now that phones are wireless, people are tied.

Going viral on Facebook:

On one hand, it’s terrible to not have access to the Internet, but on the other hand, it’s terrible to have access to the Internet.

Seen just now on Slack:

Don’t worry, man, we can probably Photoshop the deep and enduring sadness out of your eyes later.

Just shared via Threads:

“You’re always sleeping!” God forbid a girl wants to be unconscious.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’ve cooked for men I should have poisoned, so yeah, I do have self-control.

Making waves on WeChat:

If you think I’m funny, you should hear the voices in my head.

Just landed via TikTok:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Just landed via Slack:

Sawing a hole in a table from underneath to steal a cake is a lot harder than cartoons would have you believe.

24 Funny 1 quotes

More funny 1 quotes 👇

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

0

2 months ago

1, 2, beverage, create, dairy, forbidden, humor, joke, milk, mixing, playful, pun, quirky
Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

0

2 months ago

1, activity, beach, enjoying, enjoyment, fun, fun activity, getting, going, humor, preparation, ready
I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

0

2 months ago

1, activity, alone, complaints, fun, fun activity, i, myself, replay, riding, song, times
Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

0

2 months ago

1, 50, activity, after, age, age humor, calling, floor, floor activity, gift, gift wrapping, gifts, help, holiday, holiday preparation, holiday spirit, humor, preparation, spirit, stand, standing, standing up, struggle, wrapping
If you bought 1 Bitcoin ten years ago, it would now be worth 1 Bitcoin. Let that sink in.

0

2 months ago

1, ago, Bitcoin, cryptocurrency, finance, humor, investment, joke, let, let that sink in, sink, ten, value, worth, year’s
I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

0

2 months ago

1, 3, Christmas, gift, holidays, humor, i, me, package, self-care, shopping
If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

0

2 months ago

1, anniversary, anything, bad, bad luck, ever, expectations, gift, gifts, going, humor, luck, marriage, scratch, scratch ticket, ticket, wife, win, worst
Why is the Formula 1 so afraid of rain? Just drive with more caution. That’s what I always do when it rains.

0

2 months ago

1, advice, afraid, always, caution, drive, driving, formula, Formula 1, humor, i, just, racing, rain
If you turn your phone off for 1 day, you’ll realize it’s still 2007 outside.

0

2 months ago

1, 2007, day, detox, digital, digital detox, disconnect, humor, nostalgia, outside, phone, realize, still, technology, turn, year
There should be 1 day a month without commercials.

0

4 months ago

1, advertising, break, commercial, commercials, day, entertainment, humor, media, month, should, television

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Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Reddit this month:

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

40 shares on Discord this month:

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stop wasting your money on beauty products. The secret to looking young is to wear a baseball cap with a propeller on it.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

Whenever I have a headache, I take 2 aspirin and keep away from children, just like it says on the bottle.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Movies in the 80s had me convinced that a main part of being a grown-up was staying late at the office and eating Chinese takeout.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal but had no milk, so I used ice cream.

62 shares on LinkedIn this month:

All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

After careful consideration, I think I’d have way more fun if I was incredibly stupid.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

What was the name of the boat in Titanic?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

The downside to getting in a hammock is having to get out of the hammock.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

I would like you to meet my significant other. Her name is Cheese.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

I woke up this morning and my hair looked like a Beatles lyric. Here, there, and everywhere.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Live now on LinkedIn:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

Making waves on Messenger:

When you’re a snowman, everything smells like a carrot.

Going bananas on YouTube:

So basically, companies pay YouTube to show ads, and we pay YouTube to not show ads.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Just shared via X:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Just shared via YouTube:

“You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Who needs a period calendar when I know I’ll have it when I’m crying over nonsense things.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Millionaires and multi-billion dollar companies be like, “We’re doing our part by asking the poor to donate to the poor.”

Activity Log ✨

24 Funny 1 quotes

More funny 1 quotes 👇

All funny 1 quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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