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201 Funny age quotes

My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

3 months ago

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

3 months ago

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

3 months ago

I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.

3 months ago

An adult is a person who makes noise when they stand up.

3 months ago

I haven’t worn a trench coat since a random man in his 60s said to me “what are you looking for, detective?”

3 months ago

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

3 months ago

I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

3 months ago

You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

3 months ago

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

3 months ago

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

3 months ago

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

3 months ago

As you get older, nothing loses its sting more than an authority figure saying they are disappointed in you. Like, I don’t know what to tell you, dude, we can’t both live in the prison of your expectations.

3 months ago

My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

3 months ago

What does my tattoo mean? It means I couldn’t be trusted with $200 when I was 18.

3 months ago

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

3 months ago

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

3 months ago

Young people are too young nowadays. Back in the good old days, young people were my age.

3 months ago

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

3 months ago

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

3 months ago