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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Dear liars, I hope every pair of pants you own are on fire.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Today in who needs an alarm: my kid woke me up early by scream-whispering WHAT IS DUST?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

4,012

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

Making waves on Pinterest:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Just landed via Telegram:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

You only realize how heavy your handbag really is when your car tells you that your passenger is not wearing a seatbelt.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

Shared recently on Messenger:

They were called “TV programs” because they were literally programming us, bro.

Making waves on Discord:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

Just shared via Threads:

My boss was like, “People working from home are just pretending to work,” and it’s like, dude, what do you think I’m doing in the office?

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

This December is not Decembering like the other Decembers Decembered.

Home » Funny Age Quotes » Page 7

379 Funny age quotes

More funny age quotes 👇

Welcome to your 40s… you can now use this as an excuse not to help a friend move.

0

1 month ago

40s, adulthood, age, excuse, friend, help, humor, joke, move, welcome
I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

0

1 month ago

age, aging, consider, current, humor, i, joke, last, me, picture, self-image, selfie, taken, ten, time, where
Welcome to middle age. “I carried a watermelon” has gone from a movie quote to something you tell your orthopedist.

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1 month ago

age, aging, aging humor, comedy, culture, gone, humor, i, middle, middle age, movie, movie quote, orthopedist, pop, pop culture, something, tell, watermelon, welcome
Zelda was easier as a kid because if you hit a hard puzzle, you could just wait a few days for more brain matter to come in, but now it’s the opposite.

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1 month ago

age, brain, childhood, days, difficulty, easier, gaming, hard, hit, humor, just, kid, matter, mental, mental age, nostalgia, opposite, patience, puzzle, wait, Zelda
Welcome to your 50s… you can now fall asleep sitting up on the couch at any given moment.

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1 month ago

50s, age, age joke, aging, asleep, couch, fall, humor, joke, moment, relaxation, retirement, sitting, sleep, welcome
The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

0

1 month ago

age, birth, birth year, born, digital, digital age, getting, humor, i, little, nostalgia, scrolling, technology, thing, year
I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

0

1 month ago

age, annoyance, friend, friends, hate, humor, humor quote, i, noise, noises, sarcasm, social, unnecessary, useless, where
Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

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1 month ago

age, aging, aging humor, being, body, body noise, coming, figure, health, humor, life, noise, old, old age, senior, senior life, trying, why
Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

0

1 month ago

age, aging, humor, language, let, nothing, self-awareness, slang
Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

0

1 month ago

age, age humor, aging, body, bones, humor, joke, me, perspective, self-deprecating, still, young, youth

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Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

Apparently, the job interviewer doesn’t like it when your biggest weakness is beautiful Latinas.

67 shares on Instagram this month:

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

21 shares on Telegram this month:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

16 shares on Pinterest this month:

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

19 shares on Discord this month:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

69 shares on Instagram this month:

It’s a fabulous time to be alive if you love: verification codes, verifying your email, yelling ‘REAL PERSON’ into a phone at a robot, reading nightmarish news all day, every day, hot.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Having a crush should be considered a form of self-harm.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Somehow I picked the worst possible decade to try to have a career.

Seen just now on X:

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Making waves on Messenger:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

Shared recently on Facebook:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

Activity Log ✨

379 Funny age quotes

More funny age quotes 👇

All funny age quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨