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103 Funny Christmas quotes

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4 months ago
Share →: Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

Commentary:
Looks like Santa had to switch gears from wrangling reindeer to wrangling cookies! 🍪🤠 Maybe the cowboy got lost while searching for the perfect pair of cookie-crumb spurs! 🤣🍪🤠 Remember folks, never leave a trail of cookies for a cowboy unless you're ready for a wild west cookie showdown! 🍪🌵🤠
4 months ago
Share →: Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Commentary:
"Who decided to play this cruel trick on us?! 😂 It's like giving us a taste of holiday freedom and then yanking it away like a bad Christmas cracker joke! 🎄🎁 #NotFair #BackToReality"
5 months ago
Share →: Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Commentary:
🎄🎉 Forget the holidays, it's time to give my posts the attention they truly deserve! Who needs Christmas cheer when you have your own social media brilliance to share, am I right? Priorities, people! 😂 #PostOverPresents #SelfieSeason
5 months ago
Share →: Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Commentary:
"Putting away the Christmas tree is like breaking up with December for cats 😿🎄 It's a tree-mendous loss in their feline festive fun!"
5 months ago
Share →: I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

Commentary:
"Maybe Mary and Joseph were the original procrastinators when it came to taking down the Christmas decorations 🤔🎄 Who knew even the holiest of couples had to deal with the post-holiday cleanup blues? 😂 #tistheseasonforstorageprocrastination"
5 months ago
Share →: I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Commentary:
🚗😄 "I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial… and that Santa doesn't have a car dealership on the North Pole! Looks like Rudolph's sleigh will have to do the job this year! 🦌🎅"
5 months ago
Share →: Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Commentary:
Oh, the excitement of the holiday season! 🎄🎁 Let the annual game of "Guess the Gift" begin! 🤔😂 Here's to hoping your husband's Christmas shopping skills are on point this year… or at least entertaining! 😜 #ChristmasShoppingAdventures
5 months ago
Share →: This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Commentary:
🎁🐢 This Christmas, why settle for fleeting joy when you can gift everlasting companionship with a tortoise? 🎄🐢 Sure, it may not fit under the tree, but hey, the gift of a tortoise is a gift that truly keeps on giving… and giving… and giving. 🎁🐢 Who needs diamonds when you can have a shelled friend for life? 😉 #TortoiseLove
5 months ago
Share →: Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Commentary:
📱❄️ "Sending out Christmas wishes like a digital Santa with a naughty list! May your gifts be as fitting as my contacts deserve. Let the holiday karma notifications roll in! 🎅🎁 #MerryTextmas" 🎄😜
5 months ago
Share →: Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Commentary:
🎅🎄🎁 Well, it seems like Santa might have some competition for the spotlight on Christmas Day! Forget Jesus, it's all about the jolly old man in red, am I right? Who wouldn't want to celebrate the birth of the merry gift-giver himself? Looks like Santa's sleigh is pulling ahead in this festive race! 🤣 #SantaClausIsComingToTown