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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

They should invent a type of situation that improves.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Wiping my hands on my pants before I’m shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

I was a nothingburger to him, but he was an everything bagel to me…

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Much of my algorithm is based on when I paused while scrolling to grab a snack.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,613

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

Just shared via X:

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

Spotted on Facebook:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Just landed via X:

May the algorithms be with you.

Seen just now on X:

A micromanager is someone you pay to watch your top talent walk away.

Making waves on Telegram:

Reading a book is nice, but reading a book in the middle of the night when everyone is asleep is even better, it’s therapeutic.

Just landed via X:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Just shared via Snapchat:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

Just landed via Twitch:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Home » Funny Heaven Quotes

16 Funny heaven quotes

Funny heaven quotes bring a lighthearted touch to the concept of the afterlife! ☁️😂 These quotes blend humor with celestial themes, offering a playful perspective on what might await us beyond the clouds. Whether it’s imagining heavenly mishaps or whimsical takes on divine expectations, these quotes are sure to bring a smile and add a bit of levity to your day. Enjoy these heavenly laughs and let them brighten your spirits! 😇✨

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All funny heaven quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on TikTok this month:

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

Revenge has no expiry date. I will deal with you when I’m ready.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

92 shares on Slack this month:

My mirror needs a screenshot button.

23 shares on X this month:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

69 shares on Messenger this month:

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

34 shares on YouTube this month:

Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.

45 shares on Discord this month:

Baby, we believe in God around here, I don’t care what’s trending these days.

53 shares on X this month:

One of the great things about being a dad is how easy it is to launder my own desire for ice cream through my children.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

“Get a life!” Have you seen some of the lives out there?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Having an exorcism, but only because the demon requested it.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate that Al has now caused me to question the authenticity of cute animal videos online. I don’t even know if this baby penguin actually wore a beret to go buy a tiny baguette in Paris.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,694

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Most of being a woman is just removing exclamation points from emails before you send them.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

There should be 1 day a month without commercials.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Just found out that rock bottom has a basement.

Spotted on Reddit:

It’s funny how it’s often easier to access academic resources illegally, even when you have university library access.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s an extra chin.

Just shared via Twitch:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

All cars should have a rubber bumper all the way around so we can hit each other.

Shared recently on Facebook:

“Is there anything else I can assist you with today?” No, just that one thing you couldn’t assist me with, thanks.

Making waves on Twitch:

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

Going viral on Facebook:

Just got sacked from my job at a think tank for thinking about donuts.

Spotted on Instagram:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

Going viral on TikTok:

I’m fat because I’m full of experiences, and most of those experiences took place at Mexican restaurants.

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