My burning question is who thought a two day weekend would suffice the human body. Posted on2 days ago
Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt! Posted on3 days ago
The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone. Posted on4 days ago
If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays. Posted on4 days ago
I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog. Posted on4 days ago
Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people. Posted on5 days ago
Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha. Posted on5 days ago
I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot. Posted on5 days ago
Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know. Posted on1 week ago
Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab. Posted on1 week ago
The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee. Posted on1 week ago
Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it. Posted on1 week ago
They say the human body is 60% water, but after extensive observation of my husband and son, I’d like to submit a revision to the data. Those two are at least 50% wind. Posted on2 weeks ago
There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. Posted on2 weeks ago
If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape. Posted on2 weeks ago
Thank you for the opportunity but I don’t think being human is a good fit for me. I’m going to go back to school to become an octopus. Posted on2 weeks ago