43 Funny idiot quotes

• My ex is somewhere telling his new girlfriend how bad I was, and she’s smiling, thinking she made it in life. Two idiots.

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  7 hours ago

  bad, breakup, ex, girlfriend, humor, i, idiot, idiots, jealousy, life, love, love life, new, new relationship, relationship, sarcasm, smiling, somewhere, telling, thinking

• I hate liars, but what I hate more is when they think I’m an idiot and won’t find out the truth.

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  14 hours ago

  deception, hate, honesty, i, idiot, liar, think, trust, truth

• I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

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  23 hours ago

  argue, argument, behavior, business, i, idiot, idiots, internet, just, keep, mind, minding, minding business, online, online behavior, own, scrolling

• No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot.

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  5 days ago

  amount, ever, evidence, humor, idiot, persuade, persuasion, sarcasm, stubbornness

• Why do I have to take care of this idiot (me) every single day? Can’t she do anything on her own?

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  1 week ago

  anything, care, daily, daily struggle, day, dialogue, every, frustration, humor, i, idiot, inner, inner dialogue, me, own, self-awareness, self-care, self-deprecating, self-deprecating humor, single, struggle, take, why

• I’m an adult. I can do whatever I want. And yet, here I am just doing laundry, eating salads, taking antidepressants, flossing my teeth, and going on little walks. Like an IDIOT.

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  1 month ago

  adult, am, antidepressant, doing, eating, floss, flossing, going, here, humor, i, idiot, irony, just, laundry, little, responsibility, salad, self-care, taking, teeth, walk, walks, want, whatever

• Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

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  1 month ago

  alcohol, before, blame, drinking, humor, idiot, started

• I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

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  2 months ago

  humor, idiot, loyal, loyalty, relationship, stage, talking, talking stage, type

• I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

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  2 months ago

  boredom, couch, dressed, getting, getting ready, hate, i, idiot, impatience, overprepared, ready, sit, too, wait, waiting

• Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

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  2 months ago

  answer, full, humor, idiot, idiots, life, question, questions, sarcasm

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