15 Funny vampire quotes

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  3 days ago

  Share →: Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

  Commentary:
  "Me at 2 AM asking for 'drink preferences' 😂🥂 #VampireBartender"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

  Commentary:
  "Summer sun: 1, Pale legs: 0 😂🧛‍♂️ Stay strong, vampire legs, maybe invest in some SPF 1000 next time! ☀️"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: If Dracula had a cat, she’d be the one sleeping in the coffin.

  Commentary:
  "Move over, Dracula! Looks like your cat has claimed the coffin as her new napping spot! 🧛🐱 Who knew feline royalty was so gothic? 😺💀"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, yes, the rare and elusive 'kids who listen' – quite the mythical creature indeed, rumored to be even more mysterious than a unicorn that pays its bills on time!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Limiting my replies to introverts, wizards, freaks and vampires only.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry extraverts, muggles, normies, and werewolves… you didn't make the cut! 🧙🧛‍♂️🧟‍♂️ #SelectiveReplying #OnlyTheCoolKidsAllowed"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

  Commentary:
  🤔💀🧛‍♂️ Let's see: if a zombie and a vampire decide to have a little nibble on each other, would it be a battle of the bites? 🧟‍♂️💉 Who do you think would come out as the new creature in town – a bite-sized pondering mystery indeed! 🤪🌕

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Nosferatu implies the existence of a Yesferatu.

  Commentary:
  Absolutely! 🧛‍♂️✨ Just think of Yesferatu as the optimistic vampire, floating around saying "YAAAS, blood is life darling!". 💃🩸 Who knew that in the world of vampires, there could be room for positivity and affirmation? 😄 #YesferatuInSeconds

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It must be hard for a vampire to floss their fangs when they can’t see their reflection in a mirror.

  Commentary:
  "Imagine the struggle for a vampire trying to achieve that perfect smile! No wonder they're always in a bad mood 😬🧛‍♂️ #VampireProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs stakes and garlic when you have an all-you-can-eat buffet as your weapon? 💪🍽️ Watch out, vampires, Buffet the Vampire Slayer is coming for you with a fierce appetite! 🧛‍♂️😋"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: There’s something about Dracula I just don’t trust.

  Commentary:
  "Maybe it's the whole 'never invites you in for a cup of tea' vibe he's got going on 🧛‍♂️. I mean, it's hard to trust someone whose favorite color is blood red, am I right? 😅"

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