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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I now also have a device that tells me whether I’ve taken enough steps today. If I don’t make it one day, it barks and poops in my apartment.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I prayed and accidentally mixed up God and Lord and said Gord. So embarrassing.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

I heard you like bad boys. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

33 minutes ago

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

Just landed via Snapchat:

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

Seen just now on WeChat:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Seen just now on X:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Just shared via WeChat:

Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

Spotted on Twitch:

There should be guide dogs that prevent you from making bad decisions.

Trending via TikTok:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

Home » Funny Drugs Quotes

15 Funny drugs quotes

Funny drugs quotes are here to tickle your funny bone while keeping things light and cheeky 😂💊 Whether it’s clever wordplay or witty observations, these gems turn serious topics into smiles 😜✨ Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening your day—get ready to laugh out loud and see a lighter side of life! 😆🌈

New funny drugs quotes 👇

6 days ago
Share →: I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.

Commentary:
Who knew we'd be longing for catchy tunes about questionable life choices? 🎶🍷😂
1 week ago
Share →: Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Commentary:
When life gives you lemons, make… psychedelic lemonade? 🍄🍋✨
1 month ago
Share →: ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Commentary:
"ALF: Proof that the 80s were a cosmic trip even without a UFO! 🚀👽😂"
2 months ago
Share →: Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

Commentary:
"When in doubt, swap meditation for meditation-ication! 😂💊🧘‍♂️"
2 months ago
Share →: Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Commentary:
"Back then, sneaking in a phone felt like we were on an undercover mission! 🎒📱😎 #SecretAgentVibes"
4 months ago
Share →: My youngest had a mandatory drugs and alcohol lecture today at school, and he still can’t mix a proper drink.

Commentary:
Looks like the school missed out on teaching the most important life skill! 🍹💊 Hopefully, he'll stick to juice boxes until he figures it out. 😉
5 months ago
Share →: “It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

Commentary:
"Who needs drugs when you have a good book high? 📚💊 Just remember, reading may cause a permanent addiction to imagination and knowledge! 😄 #BookwormLife"
6 months ago
Share →: I’ve faced more peer pressure to watch certain TV shows than to do drugs.

Commentary:
Well, in today's world, the real gateway drug might just be Netflix! 📺💊 Just remember, binge-watching can be addictive too. Stay strong in the face of those persuasive plot twists and peer pressures! 🙅‍♂️ #JustSayNoToBadTV
6 months ago
Share →: Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

Commentary:
"Me trying to pronounce prescription drug names be like: 'Oh, Qdilrox, my old friend!' 🤔💊 Definitely feels like they're playing a game of Scrabble with a twist! 🧩😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Captain America taught me that I just need to take performance enhancing drugs to be loved by everyone.

Commentary:
Well, that's certainly one way to sum up Captain America's influence 🦸‍♂️💊… Or you could just stick with being kind, courageous, and fight against evil the old-fashioned way! 😉 Remember kids, say no to drugs and yes to heroism!

For even more funny drugs quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny drugs quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

33 minutes ago

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

I wish I was a cat. No bills, no job, just meow, meow.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Another Monday that no one asked for.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Turns out I’m not an afternoon person either.

Breaking via Threads:

If you don’t laugh at my jokes then I will.

Just shared via WeChat:

I just locked eyes with a spider. But instead of killing him I ran away and hid, so he can spend the night stressing about where I am.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Why is it called Christian community and not Holyfans?

Seen just now on Telegram:

If you ever feel useless, remember that there are bathrooms at pools.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

People found guilty of not using punctuation deserve the longest sentence possible.

Breaking via Telegram:

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Making waves on Slack:

I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.

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