57 Funny excuse quotes

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More funny excuse quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Sorry I didn’t respond to your message, I got stuck in a cloud while skydiving and lived for 72 days by drinking rain and eating birds that flew too close.

Commentary:
Wow, talk about a wild excuse for not replying! 😂 Next time, just blame it on bad signal or falling asleep. 🤷‍♂️ Hopefully, you didn't make any cloud friends up there! ☁️🦅
5 months ago
Share →: Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Commentary:
"No worries, I understand the struggle! Just remember, even superheroes need a night off from time to time. 🦸‍♂️ Stay strong, my friend, and may the force be with you against those pesky foes! 💪😄"
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

Commentary:
"Sorry for the delay, my CVS receipt decided to write a novel instead of just printing! 📃✨ Next time, I'll use it to track my reading progress instead of waiting around for it. 😆 #LongestReceiptEver"
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Commentary:
"Sorry, Earthlings! 🌍 Can't join you for now. 😄 Calling NASA and practicing my best alien impression 👽. Gotta stay ready for that intergalactic connection! 🚀 #OuttaThisWorld"
5 months ago
Share →: Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Commentary:
"Employers love a good adventure story! 🧙‍♂️💼 Just make sure to leave out the part where you accidentally almost destroyed the world 😉🌋 #ResumeGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Commentary:
Ah, the legendary ChatGPT – the ultimate dinner guest escape plan generator! 🍽️🚪 Don't worry, with ChatGPT by your side, you'll never have to endure awkward small talk or suffer through another round of your in-laws' "famous" casserole ever again! Just sit back, relax, and let the excuses flow like fine wine. 🍷✨
5 months ago
Share →: Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Commentary:
"Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions? 🚫📝 Because who needs all that paper-pushing when we can just wave some magic wands and make things happen?! ✨ #PetitionCeption #BanTheBanPetition"
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Commentary:
"No worries, better late than unemployed, right? 😂 Here's to multitasking at its finest! 🕒💼 #JobHuntingPro"
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

Commentary:
"Sorry, can't. I'm pear-occupied with my juicy ripened fruits 🍐🥭 Can't let them down, they've 'pear'-fected their ripeness game! 🍐😄 #PearPriorities"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m a “I have an appointment later, so I can’t do anything else for the rest of the day” kind of person.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'I have an appointment' excuse strikes again! 💁‍♂️ Who knew appointments were the ultimate productivity repellant? 🤣 Time to sit back, relax, and wait for that elusive appointment to magically make us busy all day! 🕰️✨"