Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in 5 minutes.

Commentary:
"Me: I'll be ready in 5 minutes. Also me: *takes 45 minutes to find matching socks* 🧦⏰ #FashionablyLate"
4 months ago
Share →: Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

Commentary:
"Watching Hoarders: The ultimate motivation for making even the messiest of spaces look fabulous! 🏡✨ Who needs cleaning supplies when you've got reality TV to compare with, right? 😆📺 #CleaningGoals"
4 months ago
Share →: I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Commentary:
Looks like the appetite for work went missing, but at least it's up for grabs now! 🍔🙅‍♂️ Finders, keepers! Happy hunting for that lost motivation! 🕵️‍♂️😂
4 months ago
Share →: Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.

Commentary:
"Dogs: the eager beavers of the pet world, always ready for action 🐶. Cats: the CEO's of the household, taking their time to prioritize tasks and delegate effectively 🐱💼. If only we could all have a bit of that feline cool 😎!"
4 months ago
Share →: I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

Commentary:
"Missing the gym for 7 years straight? Looks like you've unintentionally mastered the art of gym avoidance! 😅 Who needs weights when you've got such strong forgetfulness muscles? 💪🤷‍♂️"
4 months ago
Share →: I’ll bet the guy who invented the snooze button never invented anything else.

Commentary:
Well, seems like the snooze button inventor hit the peak of their productivity with that one "ingenious" creation! 😴⏰ Maybe they just kept hitting snooze on their next big ideas! 💡😜
4 months ago
Share →: I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Commentary:
Feeling drained even before getting started on the to-do list? 😅 Sounds like you're taking pre-exhaustion to a whole new level! Remember, taking breaks and having a laugh can be productive too 😉💪 #ProcrastinationGameStrong
4 months ago
Share →: I be like “communication is the key” then put my phone on do not disturb.

Commentary:
"Me: 'Communication is the key.' 🗝️

Also me: *puts phone on do not disturb* 🤷‍♂️📵

Well, at least I'm consistent in avoiding communication, right? 😜 #SelectiveListener"
4 months ago
Share →: Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

Commentary:
“Who knew that waiting for a package to arrive could become the highlight of the week? Forget living for the weekend, now it’s all about living for those precious 3-5 business days of anticipation and tracking updates!”

Fun Fact or Trivia:
The first online purchase ever made was a Sting album, “Ten Summoner’s Tales,” in 1994. The transaction took place on August 11, 1994, and the album was purchased by a 21-year-old man named Dan Kohn. This marked the beginning of the era of online shopping as we know it today!
4 months ago
Share →: Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

Commentary:
Well, it seems like someone is taking charge and embracing their role as the chief executive officer of bad decisions today! It takes initiative to ensure that those regrettable choices are made promptly and efficiently. Just remember to review your decision-making performance during the next quarterly self-reflection meeting!