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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Accidentally used my real personality at work today… heading to HR now.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

You have to stay up as needlessly late as possible to make the next day as horrible and hard as possible.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

The thing I bought on Etsy in 2017 has shipped.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

You can say “Have a nice day,” no problem, but saying “Enjoy the next 24 hours” sounds vaguely threatening.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

Just landed via WeChat:

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

Just shared via Reddit:

I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Live now on Messenger:

Google Maps should not count towards my screen time. I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m disoriented.

Seen just now on Discord:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Going viral on Slack:

If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Sorry for widening my eyes and whispering “The prophecy” when we first met.

64 Funny romantic quotes

Funny romantic quotes 💌 are the perfect blend of love and laughter 😂, adding a sprinkle of humor to your relationship! Whether you’re wooing your partner or just looking to lighten the mood, these witty gems 💖 promise to bring a smile to both of your faces. Dive into a world where romance meets comedy, and let these quotes be your guide to a love-filled chucklefest 😄.

New funny romantic quotes 👇

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All funny romantic quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on WeChat this month:

If I’m ever found dead in the woods, it’s probably because I was trying to pet a bear.

96 shares on Telegram this month:

Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

69 but we both just farting.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

71 shares on WeChat this month:

Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

34 shares on YouTube this month:

This can’t be the life I protected with a mask in 2020.

81 shares on Twitch this month:

Is it too late to reset my life back to factory settings?

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

The only lesson I remember from the pandemic is that you’re only supposed to wash your hands if it’s your birthday.

18 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Your honor, when I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean in contempt.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Pouring Diet Coke directly into my gunshot wound.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Still waiting for aliens to abduct me, which feels pretty rude considering I’ve been dressed and ready for years.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

That’s just brainslop. You only came up with that by thinking.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If we’re not supposed to be snacking late at night why is there a light in the fridge?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a biological clock and not an egg timer?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,622

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

About to watch Tenet for the first time and I enjoyed it.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Call me old, but these days I just get excited to go home and lay down.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Only in America can a kid wear $150 shoes, sip a $8 coffee, and post from a $1,200 phone about being oppressed and claiming capitalism has failed them.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Good morning to everyone who still believes what they see with their own two eyes.

Shared recently on Discord:

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Just landed via Reddit:

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.

Just landed via Twitch:

I don’t mean to say that I drink a lot of coffee, but Colombian farmers have a photo of me in their wallets.

Spotted on Pinterest:

By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

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