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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ή has copied:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¬ has bookmarked:

An article of clothing left on the floor long enough becomes clean again because the germs eventually get bored and leave.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡³ has copied:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has viewed:

Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡² has viewed:

When the gun shoots your brain, that’s amore.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡§ has downloaded:

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

I gave you a follow back, not a Tinder match, don’t β€œHey, beautiful” me.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡· has downloaded:

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,294

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Instagram:

I would like you to meet my significant other. Her name is Cheese.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

Going viral on Slack:

The sexual tension between me and a late afternoon coffee to get me through the workday.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I should be able to eat one huge meal a month, like a snake. This every-few-hours shit sucks.

Just landed via Threads:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Just landed via Reddit:

I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

Going viral on WeChat:

I love when people say, β€œIt is what it is,” like they just discovered stoicism.

Going viral on X:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Just landed via Facebook:

How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

Just shared via Telegram:

The older I get, the more I understand why deer run in front of cars.

64 Funny romantic quotes

Funny romantic quotes πŸ’Œ are the perfect blend of love and laughter πŸ˜‚, adding a sprinkle of humor to your relationship! Whether you’re wooing your partner or just looking to lighten the mood, these witty gems πŸ’– promise to bring a smile to both of your faces. Dive into a world where romance meets comedy, and let these quotes be your guide to a love-filled chucklefest πŸ˜„.

New funny romantic quotes πŸ‘‡

For even more funny romantic quotes, hit next πŸ‘‡

All funny romantic quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Slack this month:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

Got a botched circumcision, now my willy wonka.

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Attempted to exercise this morning. Didn’t work out.

61 shares on Threads this month:

Not to brag, but I skipped my mid-life crisis and went straight to cranky old man.

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

58 shares on Slack this month:

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

Gordon Ramsay is making us dinner. It’s a four curse meal.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

56 shares on Reddit this month:

Friends with consequences.

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I only use β€˜sir’ disrespectfully.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

At my age, “getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what you came in there for.

19 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Technically I’m still young, but according to my back pain I’m actually 69.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’ve been closer to death than a stable relationship.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

23 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

17 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

18 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

You better be kissing the screen when I send pics.

19 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,336

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡ͺ has bookmarked:

It’s all fun and games until it’s 10 p.m., you’re all cozy in bed, and you remember you still have laundry in the washer.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ό has viewed:

Notifications are a reminder that you exist.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

Female breasts are nature’s anti-stress balls. The irony is that they are connected to the biggest stress-inducing device.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

Welcome to your 50’s, you’ll look for your phone while scrolling on your phone.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΅ has viewed:

People watching you so close, you’d think you were a Netflix series.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡² has shared:

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are β€œI haven’t started either.”

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has copied:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¦ has copied:

Responding to any and all emails with β€˜wow ok’

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Seen just now on TikTok:

To the tune of β€˜Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The problem with leading by example is that no one pays attention.

Going viral on Slack:

Porn looks so funny when you’re not horny.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Alcohol and eye contact is a deadly combo.

Spotted on Discord:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Just shared via Facebook:

Long shower. Fresh sheets. Hair braided. Lights off. Candle glowing. Room smells incredible. Airplane crash videos on.

Spotted on X:

If you ever find yourself as a houseguest for an extended period of time, here is the golden rule for success: invisible by day, charming by night.

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