Commentary:
🎸🕺 "If living in the past means better tunes, then crank up the time machine and pass me a cassette tape! 🎶😂 #VintageVibes"
368 Funny say quotes
What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”
Commentary:
💌 "Looks like someone's offering more commitment than my gym membership!" 😂❤️
I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'verbal time bomb' strategy! 😂💣 Good thing my pillow is a certified therapist! 🛌🧠"
Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?
Commentary:
"Do clouds ever look down on us and say, 'This one is shaping up to be a real drizzle!'? ☁️😆💦"
You stop moving your mouse for 5 seconds, and Microsoft Teams will say you never showed up for work.
Commentary:
"Microsoft Teams be like: 'Did you fall into a black hole or just a snack break? 🍕👀'"
When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.
Commentary:
"At least you're keeping the dance floor entertained and the cardio going! 🕺😂🐶🔄"
Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…
…
Commentary:
"Breaking news: Team Fire argues global warming. Team Ice counters with ice cream shortage fears. Tune in for the meltdown! 🔥🍦😂"
I love going “Streets are saying” before I say something I literally just made up.
Commentary:
Streets be spillin' the tea I just brewed ☕️🤫😂
Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.
Commentary:
"Guess I'm in a permanent group project with the universe 🤔🤦♂️ #RaisedByDPs"
Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.
Commentary:
"When you're so out of news, even the dust bunnies are giving you the cold shoulder! 🐇📞🤣"