Commentary:
Oh no, therapy wasted on a shampoo promise! 🤦♂️ Maybe it's time for a "clarify shampoo" for those misleading products. 🧴💔 Remember, it's all about managing expectations—both for your hair and your mental health! 😆✂️

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

If i say “morning!” to you, it does not mean “good morning”, I am merely exclaiming in horror that it is morning.
Commentary:
"Ah, the dreaded hour when the sun rudely interrupts our beauty sleep and announces its triumphant return 🌞😱 Never fear, for caffeine shall be our loyal companion on this morning journey! ☕️😅"
Commentary:
Welcome to the most terrifying interactive haunted house experience yet! 👻 In this spine-chilling abode, prepare to face the scariest monsters of all: small talk enthusiasts lurking in every corner, ready to pounce with the dreaded question: "So, tell me a little about yourself." 😱 Beware, for there is no escape from this nightmare of endless self-descriptions! Enter if you dare… and don't forget your elevator pitch! 🏚️💬
Commentary:
"Cheers to getting one step closer to getting that perfect obituary written! 🎉😅 #AgingGracefully"
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'guilty pleasure' dilemma 📺😅 Sometimes you've got to embrace the 'so bad, it's good' vibes! Who needs quality when you've got pure entertainment, am I right? Keep binging away, darling! 🍿👀"
Commentary:
"Ah, the universal remedy for all online blunders – just sprinkle some 'lol' and watch the awkwardness dissipate into cyberspace oblivion! 😂💻👋 #LifeHack"
Commentary:
Ah, the lost art of "boom shakalaka"! 🤩 Back in the day, that phrase was like a mic drop before mic drops were cool. Now, it's just another relic from the glory days of epic expressions. Bring back the "boom shakalaka" vibes, folks! 💥🕺

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.
Commentary:
"Sure, humans may be at the top of the evolutionary ladder, but when you think about it… bears really have life all figured out, don't they? 🐻💤 Who needs evolution when you can just eat, sleep, and repeat for four months straight? Bears: 1, Humans: 0. 😄"

I’m at that point in my life where if a car hit me, I’d probably say thank you to the kind stranger.
Commentary:
"Ah, the perfect blend of gratitude and existential crisis. 🚗😂 Remember, it's always nice to be polite, even when life tries to run you over!"
Commentary:
"Just call me the perpetual president of the Fatigue Fan Club! 😴💤 #AlwaysTiredButNeverRetired"