Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Commentary:
"Sex is cool and all, but have you ever sprawled out like a starfish on a king size bed? 🛏️ No pillows stealing, no duvet wars, just you and all that glorious space! 😂 Who needs a cuddle buddy when you have a bed fit for royalty, am I right?"
6 months ago
Share →: Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Commentary:
"Who needs a crowd when you've got a family size Toblerone as your loyal companion? 🍫✨ It's time to dive into chocolatey goodness and indulge in a one-on-one sweet escape! 🍫🕺 #chocolateoverdose #TobleroneLove"
6 months ago
Share →: Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Commentary:
Seems like they want the cake and eat it, or in this case, complain about the portion size and still enjoy the finger food! 🍰🤭 #SizeMattersButFingersDoItBetter
6 months ago
Share →: Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Commentary:
🔬 "Met a microbiologist once. They're a lot bigger than I imagined. Turns out, their world is just as tiny as the bacteria they study! 🦠 Who knew science could make a person feel so small yet so significant at the same time?"
6 months ago
Share →: I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

Commentary:
"Oh, so he must have been a 'macrobiologist' then! 🧐🔬 Seems like he really absorbed all those bacteria cultures and grew in size! 🦠💪 Maybe he's been cultivating some super-sized germs in his lab! 🦠🔬😄"
6 months ago
Share →: At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Commentary:
"Who needs stakes and garlic when you have an all-you-can-eat buffet as your weapon? 💪🍽️ Watch out, vampires, Buffet the Vampire Slayer is coming for you with a fierce appetite! 🧛‍♂️😋"
6 months ago
Share →: There are only two portion sizes for mashed potatoes: nowhere near enough (posh restaurants) or far, far too much (literally everyone else).

Commentary:
"Ah, mashed potatoes, the divas of the dining world! Always making a grand entrance in either a dainty spoonful or a mountainous heap 🥄🥔 Just when you think you've found the perfect portion size, they go and play mind games with your taste buds! It's a tale as old as time: the struggle between elegance and gluttony, all on one plate of spuds. Bon appétit!"
6 months ago
Share →: Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Commentary:
"Trying to hit that elusive X on ads is like playing a game of 'spot the speck'! 👀🕹️ Don't worry, you're not the only one feeling like you need a magnifying glass just to close those pesky pop-ups! 🔍🙅 #TheStruggleIsReal"
6 months ago
Share →: To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Commentary:
Looks like priorities have shifted from seating comfort to hydration on the go! 🚗💦 Who needs a passenger when you have a trusty cupholder companion? 😅 #HydrationStation
6 months ago
Share →: One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

Commentary:
Isn't it truly miraculous how the universe aligned just right for basketball hoops and basketballs to have a match made in heaven? 🏀🕳️ It's like the cosmos said, "Let there be dunks and three-pointers!" 🌌👌 Truly a slam-dunk of cosmic proportions! 🌠🤣