Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Commentary:
“When life gives you sass, respond with class 😏🤯 #SarcasmVersusDiplomacy”
6 months ago
Share →: I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

Commentary:
"Love has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you least expect it! Who would've thought a singles night would lead to a partner-in-crime who was busy managing a whole squad at home? 🤣🏡💑 #UnexpectedLoveStories"
6 months ago
Share →: If I ever experience an earthquake, my first thought will probably be it’s Godzilla.

Commentary:
"Earthquake? More like Godzilla making a grand entrance, am I right? 🦖🌍 Hold onto your popcorn, folks! 😂 #GodzillaVsEarthquake"
6 months ago
Share →: It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Commentary:
"Step aside, front door – you're not the only one bringing the heat! 🔥🚪 Opening you up feels like walking into a baking show instead of the great outdoors. I better check for cookies, just in case! 🍪😅"
6 months ago
Share →: Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Commentary:
Looks like the sky finally sorted out its identity crisis! 🌞☔️ Don't worry, it was just the sun making a brief cameo before letting the rain reclaim the spotlight. Mother Nature's just keeping things interesting! 🌦️ #WeatherDrama
6 months ago
Share →: I made all my money in the 80s selling Rubik’s Hammers. They were for those cubes that thought they were smarter than you.

Commentary:
"Well, who's the genius now, huh, Rubik's cubes? 😏💰 Say goodbye to those smug faces as I smash my way to success with Rubik's Hammers! 🔨💪 #80sInnovation"
6 months ago
Share →: Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Commentary:
Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that's an interesting thought, here's six billion more. 🧠💭💤 When your brain hits you with a late-night brainstorming session just as you're drifting off to dreamland… Thanks, brain, but can we reschedule this meeting for, oh, never? 😂🌙 #OveractiveBrain #LateNightMusings
6 months ago
Share →: Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?”

Commentary:
"Romance level: When your presence is so irresistible that someone's inner monologue goes from 'Oh well' to 'My God, why not?' 🌟😂 Who knew you had that effect on people?"
6 months ago
Share →: Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.”

Commentary:
🤣 Oh, moms and their unmatched ability to connect the dots in the most unexpected ways! Bringing you the latest family news from the depths of six degrees of separation! 🌟 Just remember, in the maternal network, no detail is too small to share! 😆 #MomLogic
6 months ago
Share →: The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.

Commentary:
"Seems like that mosquito has some fancy taste buds! 🍷🦟 Must have been looking for a more refined blood type! 😂"