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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

When younger I would walk up to the counter and the bartender would know me by name. Now it’s my pharmacist.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

I have this epiphany every night that I need to turn it up a notch.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,609

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Going viral on TikTok:

I hate liars, but what I hate more is when they think I’m an idiot and won’t find out the truth.

Making waves on Threads:

Introverts have fun, too — we just don’t care if you know.

Just shared via WeChat:

The peace of not knowing.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

Freshly posted on Slack:

May the Force be with you… especially in Monday meetings.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Home » Funny Dating Quotes » Page 50

491 Funny dating quotes

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Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

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5 months ago

bite, dating, humor, insect, joke, match, me, mosquito, right, seems, swipe

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Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

52 shares on Telegram this month:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

18 shares on Slack this month:

The people that ask Grok everything are the same people that follow Google Map directions straight into a lake.

88 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

41 shares on Facebook this month:

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

56 shares on TikTok this month:

Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ll never salute you, General Settings.

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

39 shares on YouTube this month:

Having seductive eyes is not for the weak. I feel like Medusa.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Super excited about a brand new week of hanging on by a thread.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

We work all week to work some more around the house all weekend long. Isn’t life grand?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

SHEIN does entirely too much on their app. Feels like a freaking casino every time you open it.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Crazy how every smart person recommends going for walks.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Some things are better left unsaid, but people get drunk and say them anyway.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

Seen just now on Instagram:

The best way to reach me is with intelligence and humor.

Spotted on TikTok:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Just landed via Threads:

Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.

Breaking via Telegram:

Elections is like waiting for the results of a biopsy, except half your family hopes it’s cancer.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Trending via Snapchat:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Shared recently on Threads:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m only dead on the outside.

Just landed via Messenger:

Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

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Activity Log ✨

491 Funny dating quotes

More funny dating quotes 👇

Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

All funny dating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨