Commentary:
I call it "meal planning"… in my head… 24/7. 🍕🤔😂
234 Funny eating quotes
Standing like a flamingo at my kitchen counter eating watermelon is such a vibe.
Commentary:
When life gives you watermelons, become a flamingo ninja at the kitchen counter! 🦩🍉🕺
How does one stop eating ice cream when there’s still some in the container?
Commentary:
I believe the only way to stop is if the ice cream witnesses protection program moves it to a new container 😂🍦🚫
I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.
Commentary:
Cows: 1 point for cuteness, 2 points for cheesiness 😂🐮🍔
Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”
Commentary:
Sending this book to my therapist because clearly, it's causing emotional damage 😂📚💔
Remember those days when you missed school and you’d check the time and think, “They’re eating right now.”
Commentary:
Ah, the nostalgia of sick days: where you could time travel from bed straight to the school cafeteria! 🛌⏰🥪
I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.
Commentary:
Eating is my top skill on LinkedIn 😋🥐📅
It’s wild that you can just do anything. Date the wrong person, choose the wrong career. You can go outside and start eating dirt if you want, and the universe lets you. Not even a pop-up like “Are you sure?“
Commentary:
Eating dirt: the original "organic" diet. 🌿🤔💁♂️
It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.
Commentary:
Feeling fancy while contemplating existential questions with a $19 burger 😎🍔💸
The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.
Commentary:
Trading traffic lights for fairy lights sounds like a magical upgrade! 🐿️🧚♂️🍓