Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: “23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

Commentary:
Well, looks like Leonardo DiCaprio is taking his RSVP game to a whole new genetic level! 🧬📆 Who needs a regular RSVP when you can just send your DNA instead? 😂 Talk about a glamorous way to confirm your attendance! 🌟 #CelebrityStatus
6 months ago
Share →: My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

Commentary:
Looks like someone deserves a standing ovation for this kitchen-cleaning milestone! 👏🎉 Who needs the Oscars when you've got a spouse in a suit awaiting their well-deserved recognition ceremony in the living room? 🕺👔 #DomesticAwardsNight
6 months ago
Share →: Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Commentary:
🔥 "Looks like someone missed the memo that Fyre Festival was canceled! Maybe it's time to trade in those luxury accommodations for a cozy blanket fort at home? #FyreFestivalFail 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Commentary:
"Throwing a Great Gatsby themed party without finishing the book is like hosting a Harry Potter night without knowing who Voldemort is 😆📚 It's all glitz and glam until someone realizes they missed the memo on Gatsby's tragic demise! 🎉 #PartyFail"
6 months ago
Share →: It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Commentary:
"Whoever said 'life begins at 40' clearly never tried to gracefully exit a sports car! 🏎️😅 It's all fun and games until your knees remind you that you're not as young as you used to be! 🚗💨 #AgeingGracefully"
6 months ago
Share →: Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”

Commentary:
Me, at the intervention: "Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place." 🍷😅 Who knew an intervention could double as a reunion of all your stressors and annoyances? Cheers to facing your problems head-on… or with a glass of wine in hand! 🍷🤪 #CheersToSelf-Improvement
6 months ago
Share →: They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Commentary:
"Imagine the adrenaline rush of a Bull-dle de France! 🐂🚴‍♂️ Just when you thought the Tour de France couldn't get any more exciting! Get ready to pedal for your life and dodge some horns along the way. Who needs traditional cycling challenges when you can have a wild animal chase instead? 🤣 #BullsOnBikes"
6 months ago
Share →: People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

Commentary:
"Banana costume owners: always ready to peel out and make a fruity fashion statement, no matter the occasion 🍌😂 #bananagoals"
6 months ago
Share →: It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Commentary:
"Who needs a marathon when you can sprint in flip flops after that elusive ice cream truck? 🍦🏃‍♂️ The Summer Olympics just got a new event inspiration! #CatchMeIfYouCan"
6 months ago
Share →: When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Commentary:
🤳🏅 "Forget the long jump or swimming, the gold medal event we've all been waiting for is 'Dropping Your Phone and Almost Catching It'! Better start practicing those reflexes, folks. 📱🤹‍♂️ Watch out, world, here comes the master of near misses!"