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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I made some bad choices in life, but I never bought a pair of Crocs.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Thinking you’re too smart to be manipulated is exactly how you get manipulated.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,310

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

And is your “sparkling personality” in the room with us now?

Shared recently on YouTube:

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’m not saying I’m old, but when I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Live now on Slack:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Shared recently on Telegram:

(pausing the TV and turning to my kids) Now I want to talk to you guys for a second about what Bart just told that man to do.

Trending via Messenger:

Being single is better than asking a man to act like a man.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I will never understand people who don’t gasp dramatically at rainbows.

Going viral on TikTok:

Self-awareness is such a two-edged sword. Like, yay, I know myself better, but at what cost?

172 Funny girl quotes

Funny girl quotes highlight the humor and charm of female experiences and perspectives! 👩‍🦰😂 From witty observations about everyday life to playful remarks on girlhood, these quotes capture the lighter side of being a girl. Enjoy a laugh and celebrate the fun moments that make life uniquely entertaining! 😄💁‍♀️

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Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Facebook this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

Love is in the air fryer.

95 shares on Telegram this month:

I believe in Bigfoot because Bigfoot believes in me.

22 shares on X this month:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

65 shares on Instagram this month:

The thumbs up emoji is a nice way to tell someone not only did you receive their message, you’re also done with the conversation.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I once made a joke to a coworker, and she said, “It was the funniest thing I ever said,” and suggested I post it. It got 10 likes.

52 shares on Slack this month:

Twitter is an abusement park.

54 shares on Slack this month:

Today, I’m wearing pink to raise awareness for people like me who forget to separate their red laundry from their whites.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Home is where you can walk around like a bum.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My son is teaching himself Christmas songs on the trumpet, proving things can be both beautiful and annoying.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Man, these end times are taking forever.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,559

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

I can already feel that the day is going to seize me instead of the other way around.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Taylor Swift is a psyop designed to get my wife to hum little tunes here and there.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Do you ever eat a properly salted meal and suddenly understand why the ancient Romans were willing to be paid in salt?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

My life plans are fading like Marty McFly’s family photo.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Babe, you’re not acting according to my delusions right now.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My dating checklist is down to “not the Unabomber”.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Why talk to bots when my plants listen just fine?

Live now on Snapchat:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Breaking via Messenger:

Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m an ethical hater. My hate towards you is informed, balanced, and deeply nuanced.

Just landed via Threads:

Shoutout to myself for ruining my own life.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

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