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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I’m eating for two; me and the person I strive to be.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

Making waves on X:

We should bring gargoyles back, more buildings need freaky little guys on them.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Your dog immediately knows you’re leaving when you put on nice clothes… only because you usually look homeless when you’re at home.

Spotted on Discord:

When I’m on hold and the song ends, I always expect someone to pick up the phone.

Just landed via Reddit:

What’s it called when you’re super insecure but, at the same time, you can walk into a room full of people and think you’re better than everyone else?

Spotted on Facebook:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Making waves on Discord:

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Just landed via Messenger:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Funny grown quotes

Funny grown quotes bring a hilarious twist to adulthood 🎉😂 Navigating responsibilities doesn’t have to be all serious—sometimes laughter is the best way to cope! Whether you’re dodging bills or pretending to be an expert in life, these witty gems will keep you smiling 😜✨ Get ready for a dose of humor that proves growing up is optional, but laughing is mandatory! 🎈😎

New funny grown quotes 👇

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

0

1 week ago

before, belief, believe, better, cristiano, Cristiano Ronaldo, debate, football, footballer, grown, grown man, humor, kid, kids, laugh, lionel, Lionel Messi, man, men, messi, remember, ronaldo, Santa, sports, sports debate
Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

0

2 months ago

asking, confusion, grok, grown, grown man, humor, internet, internet slang, man, men, question, real, slang
Seeing a grown man stumble when the train moves is disgusting. How will you provide for anyone?

0

2 months ago

amusement, anyone, awkwardness, comedy, disgusting, grown, grown man, humor, man, moves, parenting, physical, physical comedy, responsibility, seeing, stumble, train, transportation
Making a grown man kiss his camera on Facetime.

0

2 months ago

call, camera, Facetime, grown, grown man, humor, interaction, kiss, making, man, playful, video, video call
Very difficult being a full grown adult with a terrible fear of being “in trouble”.

0

2 months ago

adult, anxiety, being, difficult, fear, full, grown, humor, life, maturity, responsibility, terrible, trouble
I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

0

2 months ago

act, age, grown, grown up, humor, i, just, maturity, self-perception, want, young, youth
The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

0

2 months ago

cost, cost of living, economy, faster, financial, financial stress, grown, growth, housing, living, money, overtime, pay, rent, stress, thing, work
I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

0

2 months ago

again, astrology, bad, bad things, blame, fact, grown, grown up, humor, i, just, me, Mercury, parents, problems, retrograde, self-awareness, terms, things, used
Not my circus, but I’ve grown quite fond of its monkeys.

0

4 months ago

amusement, chaos, circus, fondness, grown, humor, monkey
Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

0

5 months ago

bonding, boner, carpool, club, drive, grown, grown man, home, humor, male, male bonding, man, men, strip, strip club, together

All funny grown quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on YouTube this month:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

55 shares on Discord this month:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

97 shares on Threads this month:

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

The feminine urge to say “ouch” when I bump into things that doesn’t even hurt.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

16 shares on WeChat this month:

Marriage! Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit. So proud of myself. It was a scarf, but still, let’s be positive here.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What doesn’t kill you gives you a twisted, dark sense of humor.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,433

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I don’t care if I’m standing in the window, if I said I ain’t home, I ain’t home.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Requesting the Pink Panther theme song at karaoke and just standing on the stage motionless the entire time.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Trust my gut? The thing that makes weird gurgling noises immediately when a work meeting goes quiet.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Nothing is more awkward than trying to tell an online joke to offline people.

Shared recently on Reddit:

My spirit animal is chasing his own tail.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

First date idea: we walk around a graveyard and guess how people died.

Freshly posted on X:

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Just shared via Messenger:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.

Spotted on Telegram:

If you want to know who the bad guys are, it is the side who wants you arrested for memes and jokes.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Loving her was my second biggest mistake. Not buying Bitcoins in 2010 still remains the first.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴