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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Why are fish the only thing you can monger? Let me monger some other stuff.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

My brain logged me out due to inactivity, and I can’t remember the password.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

29 minutes ago

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

On the one hand, I’d love to look sexy in a bikini. On the other hand, there’s cake.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Went to the grocery store hungry. I didn’t need to pay rent this month anyway.

Live now on Slack:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Seen just now on Discord:

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

Shared recently on Slack:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Making waves on Pinterest:

“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

Home » Funny Grown Quotes

Funny grown quotes

Funny grown quotes bring a hilarious twist to adulthood 🎉😂 Navigating responsibilities doesn’t have to be all serious—sometimes laughter is the best way to cope! Whether you’re dodging bills or pretending to be an expert in life, these witty gems will keep you smiling 😜✨ Get ready for a dose of humor that proves growing up is optional, but laughing is mandatory! 🎈😎

New funny grown quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Seeing a grown man stumble when the train moves is disgusting. How will you provide for anyone?

Commentary:
"Watching a grown man stumble on a train makes me wonder if he's planning to provide comic relief for the family instead! 🤣🚂 #ProviderOfJokes"
6 months ago
Share →: Making a grown man kiss his camera on Facetime.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the modern ritual of making grown men pucker up for a steamy smooch with their trusty camera on Facetime 📸💋. Who needs cupid's arrow when technology can make hearts flutter at the touch of a button? #CameraKisses"
6 months ago
Share →: Very difficult being a full grown adult with a terrible fear of being “in trouble”.

Commentary:
"Ah, the struggle of adulting with a lingering fear of detention 🚫⏰. Just when you thought report cards were a thing of the past, here comes the real-world version of 'you're in trouble!' 😅 #AdultingWoest"
6 months ago
Share →: I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

Commentary:
"Age is just a number…until it comes to paying bills and doing taxes! 😅 Embrace your inner Peter Pan and sprinkle a little pixie dust on those adult responsibilities! ✨ Who says you have to stop playing hide and seek just because you're all grown up? 🙈 #ForeverYoung"
6 months ago
Share →: The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Commentary:
"Rent keeps going up faster than my hopes of ever having a work-life balance 🏠💸🕰️ #RentIsTooHighButSoAreMyHopes"
6 months ago
Share →: I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

Commentary:
"Well, blame it on the stars, not the folks who gave you life! 🌟✨ Looks like Mercury retrograde gets more airtime than family drama these days! 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 #CosmicExcuses"

For even more funny grown quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny grown quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

29 minutes ago

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I really want to be nice, but annoying people just won’t let me.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Instead of hairstyles and make-up, there should be YouTube tutorials on polite behavior.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

If I’m giving you attention, feel blessed. My real passion is ignoring people.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Don’t play with the feelings I barely have.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

Trending via Messenger:

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Just shared via Twitch:

When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Making waves on Messenger:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Trending via Facebook:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Just shared via Slack:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Making waves on Messenger:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

Going viral on Messenger:

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

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