142 Funny marriage quotes

Funny marriage quotes offer a humorous look at the ups and downs of married life! 💍😂 From witty remarks about the quirks of being married to playful observations on the challenges and joys of partnership, these quotes capture the lighter side of wedded bliss. Enjoy a laugh and celebrate the fun in your marriage! 😄❤️

Before marrying someone, listen long and hard to the sounds…

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Chew-s wisely! Your lifetime soundtrack shouldn't sound like an orchestra of potato chips 🍟🎧😄

Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so…

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Just when you think you've unlocked all the character backstory, they hit you with a surprise DLC! 🤯🎮🤣

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and…

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When your brain finally boots up and you realize marriage might need more than a 10-year warranty 🤔💍🤣

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want…

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Still waiting for that "merge accounts" level magic! 💸💏

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Whee…

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So they had both dolls and horsepower in the family! Talk about a match made in toy heaven. 🚗👠💕

“I’m not jealous of nobody but stay-at-home wives who are m…

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Living the dream: chores in paradise with a limitless credit card! 💸🧺🍹

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do…

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Navigating dinner plans in marriage: the ultimate test of patience and menu negotiation skills 🍽️🧐💑

Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a sl…

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Sounds like someone needs to update their definition app! 😂🕵️‍♀️🔍

I don’t think I’d get married again, but I would like to an…

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Perfect! My therapist says I need new hobbies anyway! 😂💍🪦

Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxi…

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Math homework and carpooling: unlocking the true potential of 'me time' 😂🔢🚗