Wordgag ツ

Jan 26, 2025
Share →: People are always saying “not today, Satan” but what if we just hear him out.

Commentary:
"Maybe Satan just wants to share his side of the story and have a change of heart 🤔 After all, even the devil deserves a fair chance, right? Who knows, you might end up having a surprisingly enlightening conversation with the Prince of Darkness! 😈 #HearSatanOut"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Commentary:
Looks like someone's passion for space was out of this world, but their lunch radar was a bit off! 🚀🥪 Next time, remember: fueling your stomach is just as important as fueling rockets! Keep shooting for the stars, and maybe pack a snack for the journey. 😉
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Donating blood today to make room for more food.

Commentary:
"Who needs extra blood when you can have extra dessert? 🍩💉 Making sure there's always space for that post-donation snack! 😉 #FoodOverBlood"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Commentary:
"Remember folks, retail workers are not miracle workers! 🙄 Next time, maybe start your shopping a tad earlier than waiting for Mary's waters to break. Just a thought! 😂 #BeKindToRetailWorkers"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: 90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

Commentary:
"Back in the 90s, scientists were all about cloning sheep 🐑, landing robots on Mars 🚀, and making major breakthroughs. Now in 2021, they're stuck explaining to flat earthers that yes, the Earth is indeed round 🌍. Oh, how the tables have turned! 🔄😂"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Commentary:
🎶🪗 Ah, the age-old dilemma: mastering the accordion or showcasing your new talent at work? Remember, nothing charms coworkers more than the unexpected serenade of an accordion during meetings! Your call… but we're just saying, the office could use a little more *oom-pah-pah*! 😄🎵
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Commentary:
"Another year wiser? 🎂 Nah! Just one year closer to perfecting the art of adulting… or not! 🙃 Age is just a number, maturity is optional! 😜🎉"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: People should be able to call in healthy: “Look, I’m not coming into the office today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it on being at work.“

Commentary:
"Breaking news: local hero ditches work to embrace feeling good 😎✨ Who needs a sick day when you can have a 'feeling awesome day' instead?! 🙌🏼 #WorkGoals #PrioritizeWellness"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Commentary:
"Looks like autocorrect is the ultimate wingman trying to spice up your plans! 🤣 Who knew a simple question could lead to a canceled hangout. Always double-check before hitting send, folks! 🔍 #TechFail #AutoIncorrect"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Just gonna drink light beers today, because I don’t wanna get drunk but I do enjoy peeing 30 times.

Commentary:
"Opting for light beers – the ultimate hydration experience! 💦 Who needs a gym membership when you can do bathroom sprints all day? 🏃‍♂️😂 Stay hydrated, folks!"