Funny quotes where Page 2

176 Funny where quotes

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

3 months ago

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

3 months ago

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

3 months ago

Does anyone know where I can get my shit together?

3 months ago

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

3 months ago

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

3 months ago

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

3 months ago

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

3 months ago

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

3 months ago

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

3 months ago

It’s time to stare blankly at my wall for hours straight and think about where I went wrong with my life.

3 months ago

Don’t bother telling me where you’re from, I have no geographical knowledge and no sense of direction.

3 months ago

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

3 months ago

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

3 months ago

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

3 months ago

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

3 months ago

My favorite voicemails are those where the person doesn’t leave one.

3 months ago

Gonna start an app for cat sitters where they can review the cats they take care of and it’ll be called Litterboxd.

3 months ago

Don’t go chasing waterfalls? The place where many video games hide easter eggs and other rare items?

3 months ago

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

3 months ago