Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Smoking weed and watching music videos as the hangout is a lost art.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

My therapist is fluffy and walks on four paws.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

If you push your belly button and nose at the same time, your brain takes a screenshot.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,328

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Breaking via X:

Can you put some pants on my voodoo doll and pop some money in the pocket, please?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

Live now on WeChat:

This year, the feliz is not navidading.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Hello, hi. Don’t invite me anywhere until next year. The money is finished. Regards.

Spotted on Slack:

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

Going viral on Telegram:

“I’ll see” = not coming, never was coming, never even considered it.

Trending via Slack:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Telemarketer: “Hello, am I speaking to the head of the household?” Me, handing the phone to my cat: “It’s for you.”

I’m tired of things costing money.

3 weeks ago

Humorous text about financial fatigue, featuring playful words on money and exhaustion.

Download image ↓

…

Commentary:
"When will they start accepting good vibes as a currency? 💸✨ #BrokeButZen"

cost, expense, financial, humor, money, sarcasm, things, tired

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Instagram this month:

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

22 shares on X this month:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

29 shares on Discord this month:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

89 shares on Slack this month:

When I quit my job I’m setting one last OOO message that just says “your email will never find me again”

32 shares on Facebook this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here making love.

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

Waiting until 4:59 p.m. on Fridays to send an email, because any response is Monday’s problem.

74 shares on Discord this month:

You’re over 35. Better go pee before you leave, pee when you get there, pee while you’re there, and pee before you leave.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Jesus died for your sins. If you don’t sin then he died for nothing!

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

I wonder what John Connor thinks now that everyone is embracing AI.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Butterflies all seem so nice but I’ll bet some of them are real bastards.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

Just landed via Messenger:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

Trending via Threads:

Any day now, there will be a child born and named Labubu.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I know sacrifice. I’m willing to pluck a few extra hairs to get to the white ones.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m tired of things costing money.

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

People text “Happy New Year” and go missing for the rest of the year!

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m tired of things costing money.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

People text “Happy New Year” and go missing for the rest of the year!

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨