Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Being a bridesmaid is an honor, but carrying the end of a CVS receipt? Now that's a whole new level of commitment! 💐🧾 #bridesmaidgoals #receiptduty"

bridesmaid, carry, CVS, end, friendship, humor, receipt, responsibility, shopping, wedding

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

0

2 months ago

embarrassing, embarrassment, even, i, impress, myself, say, self, something
80s movies: Let’s go to the future! Today: Let’s go back to the 80s!

0

5 months ago

80s, 80s movie, back, decade, future, humor, movie, nostalgia, past, time, time travel, today, travel
My spirit animal is chasing his own tail.

0

2 months ago

animal, animal behavior, behavior, chasing, humor, own, playfulness, self-awareness, spirit, spirit animal, tail
You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

0

4 months ago

90s, attraction, culture, dating, girl, humor, identity, lot, most, music, nostalgia, personality, pop, pop culture, relationship, someone, spice, Spice Girl, tell
Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.

0

2 months ago

confidence, daily, daily life, dog, enthusiasm, every, excited, excitement, happen, hell, humor, i, life, man, masculinity, moment, motivation, pet, real, shit, stand, time
Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

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3 weeks ago

alien, asking, boyfriend, date, done, experiment, gesture, humor, killed, kindness, me, only, perfect, relationship, replica, still

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Reddit this month:

In search of someone who loves me as much as I love my snooze button.

50 shares on Reddit this month:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

88 shares on Slack this month:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

45 shares on Reddit this month:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

88 shares on Facebook this month:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

99 shares on TikTok this month:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

“In a galaxy far, far away” is starting to sound quite enticing.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Bit strange that the same culture is responsible for both kissing and onion soup. You’d think they’d be incompatible.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

When I was little, I didn’t care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look in old photo albums, l realize that they didn’t care either.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Getting drunk was invented by Big Text to make you send more texts.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I’m going back to the 90s, if anyone wants to come.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m like … if parking too far away from the curb was a person.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Trending via Slack:

The problem with relationships these days is you don’t know if you’re the one being cheated on, or cheated with.

Making waves on Messenger:

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

Live now on Messenger:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

Breaking via Reddit:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Just shared via WeChat:

Some people avoid bacon for the sake of religion. I avoid religion for the sake of bacon.

Shared recently on Slack:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Just shared via YouTube:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

80s movies: Let’s go to the future! Today: Let’s go back to the 80s!

My spirit animal is chasing his own tail.

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨