Funny quotes answer

25 Funny answer quotes

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Funny Quotes Apr 1, 2025

If love is the answer then what was the question?

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Suicide is never the answer, you gotta outlive your enemies.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

When they ask “how was your weekend?” answer “better than yours” and maintain eye contact.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Called myself to see if I’d answer, sent me to voicemail. Twice.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

One of the best examples of someone posing a question that they already know the answer to is the WeightWatchers website asking me if I accept cookies.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

When the past calls, don’t answer it. It has nothing new to tell you.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

The answer is always no, I did not get enough sleep.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Apparently “Spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025