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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Caught a belt loop on a door handle and got yanked back with such force that my audio is no longer in sync with my actions.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Honestly, will never top the year I told everyone I was going to be Amelia Earhart for Halloween, and then didn’t show up to the party.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

My only addiction is coffee, which is just like crack but is legal and tastes good.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,409

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

I refuse to go to a blood bank. I’m not taking your blood money.

Shared recently on Discord:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Spotted on Facebook:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Seen just now on WeChat:

They should invent a day where it all works out.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

Going bananas on Slack:

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Just shared via TikTok:

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

Just shared via Threads:

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

27 Funny camera quotes

Funny camera quotes 📸 bring a smile to every shutterbug’s face! Whether you’re snapping selfies 🤳 or capturing candid moments, a little humor adds extra sparkle ✨ to your photography journey. Ready to laugh, click, and share some witty vibes? Let’s dive into the lighter side of lenses and memories! 😄📷

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All funny camera quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Slack this month:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

60 shares on Twitch this month:

Another customer getting a haircut started talking to my barber. Please don’t talk to my barber. You have your own.

39 shares on Telegram this month:

Being insane should at least burn calories.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

19 shares on Discord this month:

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m writing a parenting book called ‘Kids won’t listen until you scream like your mother did’.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

Nobody flirts better than a girl with zero interest.

41 shares on Threads this month:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

73 shares on X this month:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I laughed at your bad joke. I was trying to flirt.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is like bread. It gets hard at some point.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We need a slur for people that use AI.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,408

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

What archaeologists are really looking for is a hand digging back.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

Please pray for our son, who had to unload the dishwasher when “he just did this yesterday, and he’s tired.”

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

The first Humans saw the sun go up and then back down, and so they decided to call it a day.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Honestly, will never top the year I told everyone I was going to be Amelia Earhart for Halloween, and then didn’t show up to the party.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

If I was a Spice Girl I would be Mild to Medium Spice.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I love mirrors because they remind me of how pretty I am.

Trending via WeChat:

Went out of town, came back and the roomba changed all the locks.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Going viral on WeChat:

Stretching is not enough. I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Breaking via Slack:

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

Making waves on Facebook:

Why is everything 10x better at night? Driving, showering, eating, vibing to music, watching Netflix… phone calls. Like, everything.

Live now on YouTube:

I get writer’s block responding to people.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Just landed via Messenger:

The world started without permission again.

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