382 Funny every quotes

• Every day we get closer and closer to Idiocracy coming true.

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  4 hours ago

  closer, coming, culture, day, dystopia, every, future, humor, Idiocracy, pop, pop culture, prediction, satire, society, true

• Young witches boil every cauldron on high.

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  21 hours ago

  boil, boiling, cauldron, every, high, humor, magic, potion, spell, witch, young, young witch

• Why do I have to take care of this idiot (me) every single day? Can’t she do anything on her own?

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  21 hours ago

  anything, care, daily, daily struggle, day, dialogue, every, frustration, humor, i, idiot, inner, inner dialogue, me, own, self-awareness, self-care, self-deprecating, self-deprecating humor, single, struggle, take, why

• If every lesbian is into older women, who’s gonna like the younger ones?

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  1 day ago

  age, age gap, dating, every, gap, humor, lesbian, older, older woman, ones, relationship, woman, women, younger, younger woman

• It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.

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  1 day ago

  authentication, called, every, humor, IT, joke, login, password, sign-on, single, single sign-on, software, technology, time

• And today, just like every day, I learned something new . . . but I’m old, so I forgot what it was already.

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  1 day ago

  age, daily, daily life, day, every, forgetfulness, forgot, humor, i, just, learned, learning, life, memory, new, old, something, today

• Every time I turn around, it’s Monday.

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  4 days ago

  around, every, frustration, humor, i, Monday, routine, time, turn, weekday

• Every few months, the urge to eat buttered toast will possess you.

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  4 days ago

  appetite, buttered, buttered toast, craving, eat, every, food, humor, months, snack, toast, urge

• You can do laundry every day and still be behind on laundry.

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  1 week ago

  behind, chore, daily, daily task, day, every, household, humor, laundry, procrastination, still, task

• It’s finally actually Saturday after just thinking it was Saturday every day for the last five days.

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  1 week ago

  actually, after, calendar, confusion, day, days, every, five, humor, just, last, procrastination, relaxation, Saturday, thinking, time, time confusion, waiting, weekend

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