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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Coffee is just goth water.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

For International Women’s Day, I’m going to celebrate by hitting every curb I see.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

If I was a mythical creature, I’d be a Sighclops.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I think my bank account has been taking Ozempic.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Your odds are greater of being killed by a coconut rather than a shark and this is exactly why I don’t swim in coconut-infested waters.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

49 minutes ago

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

Reported on Messenger:

Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

Breaking via Discord:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Seen just now on TikTok:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Trending via YouTube:

Please stop calling 911 when you see me dancing. I’m fine!

Going viral on Pinterest:

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

Breaking via WeChat:

“The average CEO reads 52 books a year.” Yeah, because they’ve got nothing else to do.

Just landed via Slack:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Making waves on X:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Home » Funny Ex Quotes

28 Funny ex quotes

Funny ex quotes 😂 are here to remind us that laughter is the best remedy for a heartache 💔! Whether you’re reminiscing about past loves 👀 or just need a giggle, these witty quips lighten the mood and offer a humorous perspective on breakups. Embrace the hilarity of hindsight and get ready to chuckle at the quirks of love lost. Let’s turn those relationship woes into laughs and enjoy the comedic side of moving on! 🌀🌟

New funny ex quotes 👇

2 weeks ago
Share →: My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Commentary:
"Oops, looks like you're trying to connect to a forgotten network! 📵🚫 #NoSignalInThePast"
2 weeks ago
Share →: I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Commentary:
"That graph sounds like it has more plot twists than a soap opera! 📉😅 #ExAndWhyMystery"
2 months ago
Share →: Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Commentary:
"Ah, so that's the secret! Every 'nice pic 💁‍♂️' comes with a hidden 'thanks, ex!' 📸 #TeamEffort 😆❤️"
2 months ago
Share →: Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

Commentary:
"When life gives you lemons, make your ex regret it! 🍋🔥😎 #GlowUp"
2 months ago
Share →: “I saw your ex!” A very unnecessary piece of information.

Commentary:
"Thanks for the warning! 🏃‍♀️🚪 Exit stage left! 😂"
3 months ago
Share →: I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone at Apple has a cruel sense of humor 🙈📱 Keeping you in check with a sneaky sprinkle of nostalgia and heartbreak one featured photo at a time! 🐕💔😂 #ApplePranks"
3 months ago
Share →: Whoever is dating my ex, all I can say is: cheat first!

Commentary:
"Whoever is dating my ex, better bring a cheat sheet! 🕵️‍♂️🔍 #DodgingTheBullet"
4 months ago
Share →: People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

Commentary:
"Who needs ex-girlfriends when you can collect ex-crushes like Pokémon cards? Gotta catch 'em all! 😄💔 #HeartbreakMaster"
4 months ago
Share →: If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

Commentary:
Oops, so you drunk-texted your ex, huh? 🍷📱 Don't panic! Just channel your inner hacker and flood their inbox with Bitcoin ads like a pro! 💻💰 Who said alcohol and technology don't mix well? 🤣 #HackYourWayOutOfAWildNight
5 months ago
Share →: My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

Commentary:
Sounds like he had a one-of-a-kind cosplay going on there 🤪👕 No need for a costume party when you can just be yourself, right? 😂 #UniqueFashionChoices

For even more funny ex quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny ex quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

49 minutes ago

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

It took me 5 minutes to do something I’ve been stressing about for 6 months. I will learn nothing from this.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

My parents think they know me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Summer: 10 minutes outside, 10 hours in front of the AC.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Kids today will never understand how many ninjas there were in the 1980s.

Trending via Instagram:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Shared recently on Slack:

Today is a wonderful day to leave me alone.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Going viral on Discord:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I wish I could turn everyone I love into a trinket, so I can keep them forever, because I am greedy and selfish.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I like how people say “travel safely” like I’m the one flying the plane.

Spotted on Reddit:

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Shared recently on Threads:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

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