Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Commentary:
"Who needs regular milk baths when you can spice things up with Cinnamon Toast Crunch? 🥛🛁🌟 Step aside, spa treatments, this breakfast concoction is the real MVP! Doctor's orders never sounded so delicious! 😄🥣"
6 months ago
Share →: Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Commentary:
"Who needs a pet when you can have a coffee cup companion on your daily commute? ☕🚗 Just watch out for those double takes and friendly waves from fellow drivers! It's the ultimate way to turn heads and make friends on the road." 🤣
6 months ago
Share →: A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Commentary:
🍪😂 "Introducing 'Crumble' – for those who swipe right for cookies faster than they swipe left on bad jokes! Find your perfect match based on your favorite cookie flavor and see if your love can stand the ultimate test of sharing your last cookie 🤷‍♂️🍪 #CrumbleLove #CookieCrush" 😆🍪
6 months ago
Share →: Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

Commentary:
🚁🪰 "When life gives you a garden and a whimsical dream, why not give helicopter trapping a gleam? Wishing you all the luck in the world, may your 'H' stand for 'Hover' and not 'Hilarious!' 🪂🪶"
6 months ago
Share →: I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

Commentary:
👮‍♂️👟 "I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers…because catching criminals is a marathon, not a sprint! 🚨👟💨" #FashionPolice #SolePatrol
6 months ago
Share →: I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's trying to turn that watermelon into a real party animal! 🍉🍸 Who needs a fancy cocktail glass when you've got a giant fruit ready to bring the fun? Just remember to eat the fruit salad, not the booze salad! 😄🍹"
6 months ago
Share →: Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Commentary:
🍅🍟 When life gives you ketchup packets, dream big – because who knows, your condiment collection might just be the secret sauce to your culinary empire! 🌟🍴 #KetchupKing #SaucyStartup
6 months ago
Share →: I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

Commentary:
"Now that's what I call eternal connection! 👻💻 Who says the afterlife can't have great download speeds, right? #WiFiForever"
6 months ago
Share →: Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Commentary:
🤔💡 "Asking the real questions here! Who needs a regular old back scratcher when you have a lightsaber, right? 💫✨ Just be sure to keep it on low setting unless you want to accidentally turn your back into a Jedi training ground. May the force of relaxation be with you! 🚀🌟"