81 Funny grocery quotes

• Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

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  3 weeks ago

  chicken, food, food humor, grocery, grocery store, humor, hunt, lot, parking, parking lot, ready, rotisserie, rotisserie chicken, shopping, shopping humor, store, thrill, waiting

• My fridge turns into a food retirement home, as soon as I buy groceries.

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  3 weeks ago

  buy, food, food storage, fridge, grocery, home, humor, i, retirement, retirement home, soon, spoilage, storage

• Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

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  3 weeks ago

  budgeting, expiration, faster, food, food waste, fruit, grocery, humor, money, paying, shopping, vegetable, vegetables, waste

• We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

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  3 weeks ago

  alien, before, Earth, grocery, grocery store, humor, joke, need, newcomer, people, shopping, store

• Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

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  3 weeks ago

  activity, forget, fun, fun activity, grocery, grocery list, home, i, list, little, memory, organization, shopping, sometimes, take, thing, time, where

• Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

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  3 weeks ago

  beautiful, beautiful woman, big, big car, buy, car, driving, gorgeous, grocery, house, humor, irony, kitchen, luxury, oh, overpriced, rich, rich woman, shopping, stock, woman

• At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

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  3 weeks ago

  change, dealing, discussing, ever, frustration, grocery, grocery store, health, humor, i, layout, mental, mental health, next, session, shopping, store, therapy, trauma

• I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your dog can stay home for the hour you’re at the grocery store or restaurant.

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  3 weeks ago

  advice, care, dog, funny advice, grocery, grocery store, hear, home, hour, humor, i, know, needs, pet, pet care, restaurant, stay, store

• In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

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  3 weeks ago

  aisle, baking, baking aisle, baking ingredient, booing, buying, everyone, extract, grocery, grocery store, humor, imitation, imitation vanilla, ingredient, shopping, store, vanilla, vanilla extract

• At the grocery store, progressively booing louder as the clerk scans each item.

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  3 weeks ago

  booing, clerk, grocery, grocery store, humor, item, louder, shopping, store

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