Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Leaving out milk and cookies for Santa is literally making an offering to a deity.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

“I’m so good at doing nothing. I wish I could get paid for it.”

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice-cream.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

They should name a personality disorder after me.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

That masculine urge to completely avoid relationships until you get your life together.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Let me seduce you with my knowledge on useless things.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,760

Funny Quotes Topics

17,769

Funny Quotes Images

15,760

Updated

Mar 1, 2026

Users Online

3,560

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.

Trending via YouTube:

Hey! Sorry I missed your text, I am processing a non-stop 24/7 onslaught of information with a brain designed to eat berries in a cave.

Going viral on X:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Making waves on Slack:

As a parent you get to see just how much a baby accomplishes in its first year of life. Because you’re awake for all of it.

Just shared via Discord:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Don’t forget to make everything about you today.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

While the optimist and pessimist argued about the glass of water, the opportunist drank it.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Just landed via Telegram:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

199 Funny mental health quotes

More funny mental health quotes 👇

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

1 month ago

boss, defeat, final, health, humor, i, jokes, life, mental, mental health, same, self-improvement, therapist, therapy, thing, trainwreck
The subtle art of letting yourself go crazy once in a while.

1 month ago

art, care, crazy, health, humor, letting, letting go, mental, mental health, once, relaxation, relief, self, self-care, stress, stress relief, subtle, while, yourself
Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

1 month ago

alone, care, coping, coping mechanism, dancing, health, humor, life, literally, love, mechanism, mental, mental health, room, save, save life, self, self-care
Money saved by using public transport instead of an Uber is paid for with your time and mental health instead.

1 month ago

commute, health, mental, mental health, money, paid, public, public transport, saved, saving, stress, time, transport, transportation, Uber, using
Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

1 month ago

anxiety, career, day, health, hitting, hour, hours, mental, mental health, random, random hour, stress, work, work worry, worry
Overthinkaholic!

1 month ago

addiction, funny word, health, humor, joke, mental, mental health, overthinking, personality, personality trait, trait, word
Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

1 month ago

being, crazy, depressed, depression, effect, fat, gain, health, help, humor, just, medication, mental, mental health, oh, pill, psychiatry, side, side effect, weight, weight gain
Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

1 month ago

form, growth, health, high, high school, media, mental, mental health, people, personal, personal growth, school, self-care, social, social media, unfollow
One of the voices in my head brought up an excellent point, so obviously he had to go.

1 month ago

excellent, head, health, humor, joke, mental, mental health, point, sarcasm, self, self-talk, talk, voice, voices
Never underestimate the healing power of not watching the news.

1 month ago

healing, healing power, health, humor, mental, mental health, never, news, power, relaxation, self-care, underestimate, watching

For even more funny mental health quotes, hit next 👇

All funny mental health quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Facebook this month:

The more I insisted marshmallows were vegetables, the angrier my doctor got.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.

38 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.

35 shares on YouTube this month:

The peace of not knowing.

71 shares on Snapchat this month:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

22 shares on Threads this month:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

My boyfriend invited the neighbors over for dinner, “sometime,” so now we have to move.

39 shares on Threads this month:

Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Driving a newer car is like “Oh weird, this one doesn’t have Shake on Highway, maybe they stopped making that feature”.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

You’re a ghost driving a meat-coated skeleton made from stardust, riding a rock, hurtling through space. Fear nothing.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Referring to normal shoes as non-bowling shoes.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Headache pro-tip: Bang your toe into something.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

The word “ugly” cannot be used on women, I’m sorry. Women just can’t be ugly, that’s a boy thing.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

Making waves on X:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

You’re confusing me with someone who cares what you think of me.

Going bananas on Twitch:

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

Activity Log ✨

199 Funny mental health quotes

More funny mental health quotes 👇

All funny mental health quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨