259 Funny much quotes

• “You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

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  2 months ago

  30, activity, daily, daily routine, day, every, exercise, fitness, humor, least, minutes, motivation, much, okay, Olympics, routine, sarcasm, should, trying

• You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

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  2 months ago

  doing, doing nothing, humor, just, know, life, much, nothing, overwhelm, procrastination, productivity, relaxation, sit, tasks

• I don’t know who needs to hear this, but no one in the world is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. People online: Hold my beer.

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  2 months ago

  beer, hear, hold, humor, i, judgment, know, much, needs, online, people, perception, pressure, self-judgment, world, yourself

• Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

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  2 months ago

  ask, day, escape, home, humor, hurt, i, me, much, myself, object, office, pain, same, time, times, too

• As a parent you get to see just how much a baby accomplishes in its first year of life. Because you’re awake for all of it.

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  2 months ago

  accomplishment, awake, baby, first year, humor, just, life, much, parent, parenting, year

• Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.

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  2 months ago

  alarm, alarm clock, better, clock, daily, daily struggle, every, feel, humor, i, inheritance, job, just, life, me, morning, morning routine, much, office, office job, procrastination, routine, struggle, work, work life

• Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

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  2 months ago

  humor, landing, looking, love, me, much, people, plane, relationship, second, someone, standing, travel

• I have so much planned today that I was already tired thinking of it yesterday.

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  2 months ago

  busy, busy day, day, humor, i, much, overthinking, planning, procrastination, thinking, tired, today, yesterday

• Some people find it strange when you talk to your pet. I find conversations with some people much stranger.

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  2 months ago

  animals, conversation, humor, i, interaction, much, people, pet, social, social interaction, strange, stranger, talk

• The government always waits until the last minute to prevent a shutdown, much like my approach to paying taxes.

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  2 months ago

  always, approach, finance, government, humor, last, last minute, minute, much, procrastination, shutdown, ta

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