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116 Funny myself quotes

Trending Funny Myself Quotes 🔥

I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.
I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.
I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.
I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.
The question I ask myself most often is, “What would a jury think about this?”

More funny myself quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Commentary:
"Reading their love posts is like a rollercoaster of emotions – you can't help but feel the urge to send condolences to the exes! 🎢😂 #RelationshipDrama"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

Commentary:
When it comes to social media validation, the struggle is real! 😂👏 Who knew the difference between 3 likes and 10 could be so significant? Remember, it's all about maximizing that digital clout, one like at a time! 📱💥 #DoItForTheDoubleDigits
5 months ago
Share →: World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

Commentary:
"World domination? 🌍 Nah, I can barely handle adulting for myself! 🤷‍♂️ It's all fun and games until someone asks me to take over the world! 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.

Commentary:
Stepping out of your comfort zone one couch cushion at a time! 🪑 Sometimes the bravest adventures involve moving a whole 3 feet away from your usual spot. 😄 #SofaJourney #LivingOnTheEdge
5 months ago
Share →: Every time I have to repeat myself, a new curse word gets added into the sentence.

Commentary:
Sounds like your vocabulary is expanding faster than your patience! 🤯🤬 Remember, a well-placed curse word can be quite cathartic – just don't let it become a full-blown novel! 📚😅
5 months ago
Share →: No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

Commentary:
Just a strategic rebranding, darling! 💁‍♂️ From significant other to expert ex, I'm elevating my status in your life. 😜 Who knew breakups could be so fashionable? 💔 #ChicExGoals
5 months ago
Share →: Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Commentary:
"Please hold all interruptions until my embarrassment performance has concluded. 🙈💃🚫#AwkwardlySpeaking"
5 months ago
Share →: Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Commentary:
"Ah, the rare talent of impressing oneself with embarrassing moments – a true mastery of self-surprise 😳👏 Who knew embarrassment could be so impressive? Keep setting the bar high, even if it's with blush-inducing remarks! 🤣"
5 months ago
Share →: I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Commentary:
Looks like the clones unionized for a sit-in protest on the couch! 🤣🛋️ At least they can bond over their mutual laziness and love for TV shows. Maybe they can start a club for clones who'd rather binge-watch than do chores! 📺🍿
5 months ago
Share →: I’ve started dating myself exclusively but it’s not working out.

Commentary:
Looks like even you can't handle your own high standards, huh? 🤷‍♂️ Who knew dating yourself could be so complicated? Maybe it's time to treat yourself to a night out to rekindle the romance with… yourself 😂💔 #SoloDateNight