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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

If I’m reading my Twitter feed correctly, Jennifer Aniston killed JFK.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

No email needs to tell me not to reply.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

8 minutes ago

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

Spotted on Snapchat:

How did we decide to go with cockpit?

Breaking via Instagram:

Everyone who got my kids board games for Christmas, when are you coming back to play with them?

Just landed via Facebook:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Just shared via X:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Welcome to your 40s: you get tired from sleeping now.

Spotted on WeChat:

Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.

Just shared via Messenger:

God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I bought a book on Feng Shui, but I don’t know where to put it.

Home » Funny Spending Quotes » Page 6

56 Funny spending quotes

More funny spending quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: I have money, then I don’t have money, it all happens so fast!

Commentary:
"Living that rollercoaster life with our finances like 🎢💸💨 One minute you're feeling like a financial wizard, the next you're wondering where did it all go?! Remember, money can disappear faster than your favorite snack in a busy office breakroom! 😂💸 #WalletWhirlwind"
6 months ago
Share →: They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

Commentary:
Well, it seems like your money has mastered the art of saying "see ya later" with a flourish! 💸👋 Maybe it's practicing for a future career in dramatic exits? Keep an eye out for those swanky handkerchiefs next time you're at the ATM! 😄
6 months ago
Share →: Why spend like $300 Dollars on a pair of shoes? Do you know how many chicken nuggets you can buy with that money?

Commentary:
"Why spend $300 on shoes when you could have a nugget-fest extravaganza instead? 🍗👠 Leave the expensive kicks for the chickens to peck at, and treat yourself to a banquet of golden nuggets instead! 😂 #ChickenNuggetCouture"
6 months ago
Share →: Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

Commentary:
"Ah, the irony of 'free time' – a misnomer for sure! It's like a budgeting black hole where money disappears faster than a magician's rabbit 🎩🐇💸 Who knew being financially liberated could come with such a price tag? 😂💸 #MoneyFleesWhenFree"
6 months ago
Share →: The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Commentary:
"Well, at least you got your cardio in! 🏃‍♂️💸 Who knew financial struggles could double as a workout plan? 💪😅"
6 months ago
Share →: My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

Commentary:
"Ah, a tattoo that serves as a cautionary tale! 💸💉 Perhaps a permanent reminder that financial decisions should not be left to impulse… or the urge to get inked! 😂"

For even more funny spending quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny spending quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

8 minutes ago

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

A two-step guide to warning someone not to hit their head: 1. Wait until they’ve hit their head. 2. Say “Ooh, mind your head!”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Has anyone ever considered that Dr. Pepper could be a gynecologist?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

My main career goal at the moment is to find a big bag of money in the woods.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

Just shared via Instagram:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

Just shared via Threads:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Spotted on Slack:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

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