249 Funny things quotes

• I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

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  3 weeks ago

  chicken, communication, eating, food, humor, i, joke, mean, misunderstanding, say, spicy, spicy chicken, things

• Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

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  1 month ago

  aging, cherry, cherry tomato, dream, dream job, fun, gardening, getting, goal, goals, grow, growing, growing plant, humor, job, land, life, life goal, older, plant, success, things, tomato, transition

• I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when I’m buying things for myself.

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  1 month ago

  am, buying, care, happier, happiness, i, love, me, much, myself, peace, retail, retail therapy, self, self-care, shopping, therapy, things, works

• Few things in life are as disappointing as having to poop right after a shower.

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  1 month ago

  after, bathroom, disappointment, having, hygiene, life, poop, right, shower, things

• We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.

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  1 month ago

  air, air fryer, cooking, curiosity, food, fryer, gadget, humor, just, kitchen, kitchen gadget, never, once, things

• Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.

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  1 month ago

  apology, communication, customer, customer service, fault, good, humor, interview, interviewer, job, job interview, me, sarcasm, service, skills, things, want, well, why, work, work skills

• I hate when I lose things at work, like my favorite pen or my will to live.

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  2 months ago

  favorite, frustration, hate, humor, i, live, lose, losing, pen, sarcasm, things, will to live, work

• If bugs could talk, they would probably say things like, “What the bug?”

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  2 months ago

  bug, bugs, humor, insect, joke, say, talk, talking, talking bug, things

• Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

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  2 months ago

  behavior, child, child behavior, dawn, difficult, difficulty, evolution, history, human, human history, humor, kid, kids, making, man, parenting, things

• Wanna worship each other until the end of all things?

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  2 months ago

  devotion, end, eternity, humor, love, relationship, things, worship

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