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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be using humor to hide pain.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

No, I am not refreshed from my long weekend. I was reminded that I am not meant to work, but I am trapped in The Machine.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Seen just now on X:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Spotted on Instagram:

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I don’t understand the concept of “the man of your dreams”. Every time my wife wakes up after dreaming about me, she is really pissed off about something dream me did.

Just shared via Facebook:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Trending via Facebook:

Playing dumb for five minutes often saves a lot of work.

Spotted on X:

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Just shared via Facebook:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

13 Funny dating advice quotes

Funny dating advice quotes bring a burst of laughter to the sometimes tricky world of love 💘😂! Whether you’re swiping right or navigating awkward first dates, these witty nuggets of wisdom keep things light and entertaining 😜💬. Perfect for sharing with your friends or saving for when you need a little romantic boost, they remind us that dating should be fun, not stressful 🎉💕. Ready to laugh your way to love? Let’s dive in! 😍🔥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Threads this month:

Does running actually get easier if you do it a lot, or is it that you just get more masochistic?

55 shares on YouTube this month:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

40 shares on Slack this month:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

78 shares on Slack this month:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

24 shares on TikTok this month:

At some point in life, you graduate from Family Guy to American Dad.

37 shares on Telegram this month:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

14 shares on TikTok this month:

If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

18 shares on Instagram this month:

Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

If you are hotter than me, it means I’m cooler than you.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been blocked by better.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

November should have one more day. Just because to me November 31st sounds real. And also I don’t want to pay rent tomorrow.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Social media is proof that even mental hospitals have WiFi.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Told a couple of jokes at a Zoom meeting. Turns out I’m not even remotely funny.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Other people: You should get out of your comfort zone. Me: You should get out of my comfort zone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,670

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Relationship status: the black mold in my shower thinks I’m cute.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Not having to bring my backpack to the last day of elementary school was the last time I truly felt free.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I wish I were a wild horse in Kazakhstan. That would fix everything.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

This book ain’t got no pictures.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

I’ll rewind a movie, get on my phone, and miss the same part.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Just landed via Instagram:

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I want to save money, but all I’m saving are memes.

Breaking via TikTok:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Spreading quickly via X:

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Just shared via Reddit:

The Pope is the only employee who never gets to see his boss. Not even at the Christmas party.

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