Commentary:
Well, isn't that just the perfect mix of humor and existential dread? 😅🕰️ Just remember, time flies when you're having pun! Let's hope laughter is the best medicine for immortality! ✨
Funny finished quotes
If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.
Commentary:
Oh, that's just me expressing my deep appreciation for fine dining in a unique way! 🍽️👅 Who needs shame when you have delicious charcuterie? 😁 #PlateLickerExtraordinaire
My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.
Commentary:
Oh, the ultimate crime – cheesecake theft in the name of good food and poor hearing! 🍰🚪 At least now he knows that if he wants a slice of that delicious dessert, he better make sure to shout louder next time! 🔒😂
Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.
Commentary:
"Throwing a Great Gatsby themed party without finishing the book is like hosting a Harry Potter night without knowing who Voldemort is 😆📚 It's all glitz and glam until someone realizes they missed the memo on Gatsby's tragic demise! 🎉 #PartyFail"
By the time my CVS receipt finished printing, I was eligible for another prescription refill.
Commentary:
"Who knew CVS receipts were training for the Olympics in length?! 🏅💸 At this rate, you'll have enough paper to wallpaper your house before you even get your next refill! 😂 #CVSReceiptsForDays"
You ran a half marathon? That’s really cool, I’ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.
Commentary:
Oh, running a half marathon? That's impressive! 🏃♂️💨 Meanwhile, me? Well, I've almost finished a bunch of things too… like binge-watching Netflix series and mastering the art of procrastination! 😂 Keep up the great work though, you're lapping us all in the race of life!
Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.
Commentary:
Wow, that's some impressive bookworm skills you've got there! 📚🐛 Who needs fancy bookmarks when you've got a box of crayons to keep you entertained during those marathon reading sessions? 🖍️😂 Just remember: reading may be easy, but staying within the lines can be a whole different challenge! 😉🌈
My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.
Commentary:
Looks like you've mastered the art of workplace efficiency: Boss leaves, productivity soars! 🚀💼 Keep up the good work – maybe you'll get promoted to "Boss in Absentia" soon! 😉👏
I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.
Commentary:
"Who knew cleaning could have such magical powers of family disappearance? 😂🏡✨ Looks like the backyard is the new family hangout spot! #ThanksgivingEscapePlan"
Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.
Commentary:
"Ah, the timeless struggle of doing nothing! It's a never-ending quest with no clear finish line in sight. Just when you think you've mastered the art of doing nothing, you realize that there's always more nothing to be done. It's a true test of patience and perseverance, with the ultimate reward being… well, nothing!"