Funny quotes health Page 7

172 Funny health quotes

Funny health quotes are a lighthearted way to remind us that wellness doesn’t always have to be so serious! 🏃‍♀️😆 From exercise mishaps to diet struggles, these quotes show that staying healthy can be hilarious too. 😂🍎

I’m gonna start telling men I know a spot and it’s just me dropping them off at therapy.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

I didn’t really mind the voices in my head until one of them started their own podcast.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

When this multivitamin kicks in I’m going to do so much success.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Welcome to your 50s, your knees will now decide when you will sit down.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

Googled my symptoms and it turns out it’s just the politics.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Blood pressure too high to chase these hoes.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Just got my test results back and my cholesterol level is a cheese bratwurst.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Self-esteem’s so bad my fantasies are hurting my feelings.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

My immune system told me it’s a lover not a fighter.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I bought all this healthy food at the grocery store today and now I’m trying to decide if I want Chinese food or pizza delivered for dinner tonight.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025