220 Funny kids quotes

• In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  80s, divorce, documentary, family, film, humor, i, kid, kids, literally, pretty, retro, saw, shrink, shrink-ray, sure, technology, wife

• If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  able, age, book, childhood, dinner, explaining, humor, kids, little, nostalgia, old, phone, phone book, reach, sit, table, teenager, today, try, used

• Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  childhood, enough, family, humor, kid, kids, old, parent, parenting, problem, relationship

• My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  bored, boredom, enough, entertain, entertainment, family, family life, favorite, getting, humor, kid, kid boredom, kids, life, parenting, patience, point, self, self entertainment

• Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  behavior, child, child behavior, correct, humor, i, interruption, kid, kids, moment, parenting, yourself

• Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  algebra, family, family life, humor, kid, kids, life, marriage, married, parenting, practice, relaxation, relaxing, weeknight

• My kids will never appreciate the amount of extroverting the introvert me does for them.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  amount, appreciate, effort, extrovert, family, humor, introvert, kid, kids, me, never, parenting, social, social effort

• Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  cartoon, cartoons, childhood, classical, classical music, contrast, humor, kid, kids, maybe, music, nostalgia, reason, saw, violence

• My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  asked, childhood, fan, game, games, humor, i, iPad, joke, kid, kids, me, play, question, robot, sound, speak, speech, technology, told, used

• Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  being, city, different, else, expense, expensive, family, humor, kid, kids, parenting, price, price tag, put, tag, travel, ungrateful, vacation

All funny kids quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌